In our world today, we are programmed to believe that every story, every conflict, every struggle ends in a "happily ever after" fashion. Each problem we face must conclude with a tidy ending wrapped up neatly with a bow on top. With movies and TV as our example and the instant gratification mentality that our society has acquired, it's no wonder we expect instant answers and quick resolution. But what happens when certain seasons of life don't play out in the way we expect? What if there isn't a quick fix to the problems we are facing? What if things don't just work out?
I've been in such a strange season of life recently. I'm getting older and life is changing rapidly right before my eyes. Friends are scattered and in different phases of life. Work is more of a duty than a source of passion and fulfillment. Being a wife and a mother is on the forefront of my mind most hours of most days. I can feel myself slipping away from my old life while this new phase takes over. In so many ways, this is such a joyful and meaningful time. I am so very happy in many aspects of my life, but on the flip side, this season of life is very challenging and sometimes lonely. Friendships are changing, my purpose is evolving, and the sense of community that I once felt seems to be fleeting. It's easy to feel a little lost in all the changes. That question of "Who am I?" keeps coming back in my mind as I feel like I am almost redefining myself through this season of life. Some days feel a lot like going through the fire to hopefully come out better on the other side. It's such a confusing time.
I've gone to God many times at this point and just asked "why"? Why am I going through this season and why do I feel so alone in it sometimes? Why do things have to change and why haven't You provided me with the solution to how I'm feeling? Why does life give us seasons that are so paradoxical and inconsistent? I kept asking these questions and looking for the lesson that God was trying to teach me through all of this. I kept wanting the pain to be quick and the healing to show itself instantly. I kept waiting on the "Great Provider" to give me what I was longing for. I figured, I'll just have faith and He will come through. God will get me out of this "pit" and give me a magical rope to pull myself out. He is going to change my situation, just you wait.
As time went on, I felt worn down from the struggles I was facing and felt like things weren't changing at all. I had waited and waited, made every effort I could, and things were still the same. What the heck, God? What are you doing here? It's taken me a while to see it, but I feel like God is teaching me a huge lesson through this season. And it doesn't have a fairy tale ending...at least not yet. This story involves things staying the same and me being the one to (begrudgingly) change. I'm striving to be content in this season even though things aren't exactly how I wish they were. I'm reminded to be thankful for all the things I do have and all the things that are going as I hoped. Sometimes no matter how much we wish, there isn't always a quick and easy fix to our trials and tribulations. Sometimes the answer is just learning to lean more and more into God and find your comfort and strength in the one thing that will never change. I don't know how this story ends yet, but I continue to have faith. And I urge you to do the same. When "happily ever after" hasn't come yet....that's when you keep going, keep believing, keep trusting. But you can also let yourself be disappointed. Let yourself ask the hard questions. Not every season of life has a picture perfect ending. Sometimes the struggle continues and that's okay. I'm learning to accept that and I hope you do too.
Showing posts with label advice. Show all posts
Showing posts with label advice. Show all posts
Monday, November 2, 2015
Friday, October 30, 2015
How Do I Deal With Stress?
Happy Monday, everyone! Is today the epitome of a Monday morning or what?! If you are in the Atlanta area, then you know the monsoon-like weather, crazy traffic jams, and time change adjustment that I am speaking of. Not exactly the most relaxing start to the week! If you are feeling a little overwhelmed, on edge, or just straight up tired this Monday morning, then this post is especially for you! We all have stress in our lives, whether that be Monday morning on a busy week type stress or just everyday life stress. We may think that stress limits itself to those who have a mortgage to pay or food to put on the table or 5 little kids running around, but in fact, stress encompasses all ages. Even our youth are experiencing more stress than we probably did at their age. I found that out last week as I was preparing the lesson for our youth girl's Bible study. I've been part of this particular girl's middle and high school Bible study at our church for almost 2.5 years now. I love investing in young girl's lives especially at this fragile age of peer pressure, awkward middle school years (wasn't it for everyone?!) and coming into your own. I wish I had someone who would have been able to pour spiritual truth and guidance into my life at this age, so I get pretty excited do be able to do that for someone else.
Once in a while, I teach the lesson for the week and this time around, I asked the girls what they wanted me to talk about and what would help them the most. Each week, these girls come to our Bible study with burdens, stresses, and anxiety. They have so much going on in their lives at such a young age and each week they are overwhelmed and just worn out. So to no surprise, they asked me to talk about managing stress and negativity! I thought this was pretty ironic because anyone who knows me knows that I am a very easily stressed individual. I deal with anxiety regularly and usually seem like a little bit of a crazy person compared to my cool-as-a-cucumber, thrives on procrastination, "everything will work out, just relax", scatterbrained but somehow always pulls it off last minute husband. He thrives on the unplanned, spontaneous, and natural eb and flow of life while I retreat to a corner and get out my paper bag to calm my breathing during the potential panic attack that most likely is arising in me during the chaos and confusion of life. Type A personalities unite! God has been teaching me for years about managing stress in my life and it's a constant work in progress for me because I am a natural worrier. Isn't that always how it works though? God uses our weaknesses and stories of restoration to help others by showing them what He's taught us. He rescues us, so that we can then go and rescue others dealing with similar issues. So after some thinking about past experiences and rereading a few posts I've written in this space from the past, I came up with a short list of ways to help deal with stress. This list doesn't just apply to middle and high school girls, but to anyone when they are feeling overwhelmed. I hope these tips bring you some peace and calm next time life gets you down.
1. Perspective -- the phrase "first-world problems" may be trite, but it has become popular for a reason. During times of major stress in my life, I try to step make and put everything in perspective. It's really easy to get caught up in your particular problem and think the world is coming to an end. Am I the only one who can be a tad on the dramatic side? It's so important to remember to keep perspective. Whatever is causing your anxiety, probably isn't that bad even though in the moment it may seem like it. Sometimes our problems just seem straight up silly and almost laughable when we put them in perspective. I tend to get so sucked into my problems that I forget to take a step back and breathe. When I do, I usually remember how blessed I really am and how a lot of these stresses usually come out of things that are actually blessings in my life. My house is messy? That means I have a roof over my head. I'm not happy about my new responsibilities at work? That means I have a job. My baby is teething and keeping me up all night? That means I'm lucky enough to have a healthy child. My husband left his stuff all over the house again? That means I have someone to share my life with...the good, the bad and the annoying. This method might seem a little corny, but I find that gaining perspective during a difficult time really helps our thankful spirit come out instead of focusing on the negativity. Which brings me to my next point...
2. Positive attitude -- Having a positive attitude is so important these days. I mean have you watched the news recently? It is filled with bad things that are meant to bring us down. It's so easy to be negative in our world today, but a negative attitude is detrimental, especially during stressful seasons of life. I am the first to admit that I sometimes struggle with having a positive attitude and seem to focus on what's going wrong so much more quickly than on what's going right. All this does is accentuate the bad and belittle the good. We define the good and bad in our lives. We have more control over the outlook of our day than we give ourselves credit for. There's always good to outweigh the bad, but we have to evoke the right attitude in order to see that. Plus, who wants to be around someone who is negative and always complaining?! I sure don't. A positive attitude goes a long way in uplifting ourselves on a bad day.
3. Praying -- Are you familiar with the phase, "Have you prayed about it as much as you've talked about it?". I can fall into this trap so easily. It's so effortless to tell people all about your problems, but never bring them to God. I have even been guilty of asking people to pray for me about certain stresses in my life without even praying about them myself. There's a therapeutic aspect to venting to a friend, but I think we often forget about how restorative a conversation with God can be. I find that when I complain to a friend, I might come away feeling better for a little while, but those same problems seem to creep back up. When I bring my struggles to God, He gives me a peace beyond understand and a healing in return. He lifts my burdens off my back and carries them on His own, leaving me feeling weightless and free. Praying takes more discipline than just complaining to a friend or even posting about it on Facebook (yep, we've all done it), but it's a much more beneficial step for us in the end.
4. Past answered prayers -- One of the most powerful ways I deal with stress is thinking about what God has done for me in the past. There are times when I think there's no way a situation is going to work out or a solution to a major problem is ever going to come, but then I stop and think, "Has God ever failed me?". Well....no. I think about the fact that a year ago I had a whole other plethora of problems in my life that have since been resolved. I think about all the prayers I've prayed that have been answered and how God has always given me a solution whether that be something tangible or just letting me know that He is the solution. He's never left me hanging, so why am I thinking He will this time? A calm comes over me when I remember the faithfulness of God in my life knowing that God will continue being reliable and consistent for me.
Monday, October 12, 2015
Perfection + Motherhood Just Don't Mix
I am someone who always strives for the best. I am a Type A personality all the way and I set really high expectations for myself. I don't handle "failure" well and I can be really hard on myself. Motherhood has really tested my confidence in myself and my abilities. It's challenged me in ways I wasn't expecting or prepared for. There are so many days, most days in fact, that things don't go as planned. Instead of accepting this imperfection as just a part of life and being a parent, I began to internalize these shortcomings and feel like I was failing. I felt like I was failing as a mom and failing at teaching my son all the things he's "supposed" to know and how he's "supposed" to act. On the tough days with Grayson, I felt like I was doing something wrong and I wasn't living up to the mother I thought I would be. I felt disappointed in myself and at a loss because a lot of the issues I was having with him didn't have any easy fix. They would take time, patience, and a lot of grace to conquer.
As I began to feel more insecure as a mother, I started to look at other mothers and babies. I did this mostly for guidance, but it soon became about something much more. I've always struggling with comparing, but becoming a mother has really made my insecurities surface. I started seeing pictures of other babies doing this and that and thinking...why doesn't my child do that? What am I doing wrong? I would hear stories of babies much younger than Grayson eating solids 3 meals a day and sleeping through the night at a few months old (two major ongoing struggles for us) and immediately felt terrible about myself. I would look at the successes of other mothers and their children and deeply question myself and my abilities to parent. Comparison soon became a parasite in my life, sucking a lot of the joy and confidence out of my days. As much as I love social media and keeping up with other moms, sometimes their posts and pictures were challenging to see. It was hard not to feel jealous of their successes while I was over here feeling like I was barely able to keep afloat in this ship called raising a child. There is a quote that says, "Comparison is the thief of joy" and that is so very true. Instead of feeling happy for others, comparison stole the joy right out of my day and brought me so far down. I needed positivity, confidence, and support and comparison was giving me the opposite of that.
As time goes on and with a lot of encouragement from others, I am realizing that my journey as a mother isn't going to be perfect. I'm not going to have a perfect child or have perfect parenting skills. I'm still very new at this and I am constantly learning. My son may not sleep through the night or eat many solids or let other people hold him half the time, but that's okay. Every child is different and each one of them has strengths and weaknesses. And those areas that need improvement aren't necessarily a reflection of my ability to be a good mom. Love is what makes me a good mom (or so I'm told). I love my son so stinkin' much and I am constantly trying my absolute best for him. And at the end of the day, that's all I can do. These insecurities are still something I'm dealing with on a daily basis, but I wanted to share a little bit of my journey with you all. I hope that if there are any other moms out there who also struggle with these things that they know they aren't alone in these fears. No day with your child is going to be perfect, but that doesn't mean it isn't rich in love and joy. And that's what really matters, isn't it? Your ability to be a good mom doesn't hinge on your child hitting milestones or acting angelic all the time. So keep going, keep trying, and keep smiling. Find that inner confidence because you ARE a good mom. It's going to be messy, loud, hard, trying and so much fun...oh the journey of motherhood!
Monday, March 16, 2015
Breastfeeding Essentials
Breastfeeding essentials, sounds like a blast, right? Breastfeeding is something that has been happening since the beginning of time, but in recent years, the topic has become a little more taboo. Breastfeeding isn't always discussed as freely as it should be and a lot of women are very private about the subject. While it's totally fine to be modest when it comes to breastfeeding, I believe it's important for us, as women, to be open and honest with each other when it comes to anything and everything mommy. No, I don't mean women cutting each other down as parents and insisting that their way is the best. I mean that it's important for mothers to humbly share their knowledge and what works for them. That is why I chose to write this particular post. These are the items that have really helped me when it comes to breastfeeding. I have a 2.5 month old son and he has been exclusively breastfed since day one. I was so grateful for the friendly advice I got from other mothers about things that helped them while breastfeeding. I wish there were more articles out there with helpful hints concerning the subject. Breastfeeding is hard and it takes dedication. These products have helped me stick with breastfeeding despite the struggles and challenges I've faced on the way. So here's my two cents:
1. Medela In Style Advanced Pump -- Whether you are planning on returning back to work or you are going to be a stay-at-home mom, I highly recommend getting a breast pump and specifically this one. The Medela In Style Advanced Pump is an awesome breast pump! I got it free through my insurance (retails $200) and it has been so helpful for me as a working mom. I recommend that you ask your health insurance if they cover a breast pump before you go out and purchase one because most companies will cover one for free! This pump is great because it's electric and a double pump meaning the pump does all the work, so I don't have to AND I can pump on both sides at once which cuts my pumping time in half. I use this pump on the days that I work, so that I can pump bottles for my baby. The pump is compact, light, and easy to bring with you wherever you go. It's super easy to use (even though it looks a little intimidating at first) and hassle-free. I also love the Medela brand because you can get everything you need for the pump (bottles, tops, nipples, etc.) at Target instead of having to order online. I think it's awesome to have a pump for when you need to leave your baby with someone or if you want daddy to be able to help out and feed baby as well. As much as I love breastfeeding, sometimes it's nice to be able to have some help and not be the sole food source. I was terrified about going back to work because I thought I would have to give up breastfeeding, but this pump has allowed me to continue on exclusively breastfeeding my son. I am so grateful I didn't have to give up breastfeeding and I owe a lot of that to this pump!
2. Nipple shield -- The nipple shield was a lifesaver for me in the first few weeks of breastfeeding! Luckily a friend recommended this to me before Grayson was born, so I had one on hand. I would highly recommend buying one BEFORE your baby arrives if you are planning on breastfeeding because when you want it, you want it immediately (because you are in major pain). I knew breastfeeding wasn't going to be a walk in the park and had heard horror stories from many friends. I am blessed to be able to say that breastfeeding has gone very smoothly for Grayson and I. But no matter how smoothly it goes, those first few weeks are always tough! It takes your body a while to adjust to a tiny human being attached to your nipple for a majority of the time. Your nipples literally have to "toughen up" and that process is very painful. I would say it took me a good three weeks before my body was used to breast feeding and I wasn't in pain every time he latched on. But those first few weeks...ouch! I literally felt nauseous each time he would latch on and would tell my husband how ridiculous it was that it hurt THAT badly. That's where the nipple shield came in. I wouldn't use it all the time, but I would use it when one side was in dire need of a break. The nipple shield helped get me through the painful times when it would have been easy to give up on breastfeeding. I picked mine up at Target for under $10 (worth every penny).
3. Lanolin nipple cream -- This cream was another lifesaver during the first few weeks of breastfeeding. Your nipples crack, bleed, and are super sensitive when they are adjusting to breastfeeding. It's painful! This cream was really helpful in making the adjustment bearable and gave me the relief I needed between feedings. The product is natural and safe for your baby to digest (inevitable if you are feeding every 2 hours). Highly recommend having this on hand BEFORE baby arrives as well. You'll thank me I promise! You can find this cream pretty much anywhere and a little goes a long way, so it lasts a long time.
4. Nursing bras -- If you are planning on breastfeeding for any length of time, you are going to want to invest in a good nursing bra. If you are currently breastfeeding, you know how often you are removing your bra. If you aren't yet, then you are about to learn! For the first month or two, your baby eats almost every two hours. It makes life much easier if you are wearing a bra that you don't have to take off or mess with each time the baby feeds. Find one that is comfortable and easy to latch off and on. I bought two nursing bras before I had Grayson and I love them both. The first one is a soft and comfy wireless bra that I wear at night or if I'm at home for the day. It's a cotton material and allows you to feed your baby very easily while keeping mom comfortable. The second bra I purchased almost looks like a regular bra with underwire but it has the latches on it that make breastfeeding extremely convenient. I needed a nursing bra with underwire for going out in public, just a personal preference. The awesome thing about this bra is that is looks and acts like a regular bra, but just makes breastfeeding a heck of a lot easier! I bought both my nursing bras at Motherhood Maternity and would recommend that store if you want a quality and comfortable nursing bra. I looked at Target and Wal-Mart for nursing bras and couldn't ever find anything that wasn't extremely uncomfortable to wear. Nursing bras are purely needed for convenience, but I think they are worth the investment. I love being able to wear a regular bra and still easily nurse my baby!
5. Nursing cover -- Before I had Grayson, I didn't know what type of mom I would be when it came to breastfeeding. I didn't think I would be the mom that breastfed in public with no cover at all, but I had no clue how comfortable I would be breastfeeding in public even with a cover. I went to a consignment sale and bought a nice Baby Balboa nursing cover for $5. I bought it just in case I needed it in the future and I am really glad I did! The cover has already come in handy so many times. I soon realized that although I don't love breastfeeding in public, I also hate leaving the group and going to sit in a room by myself for 20 minutes while everyone else is together. It wasn't always convenient to find a private (and clean) place to nurse, so I would pull out my nursing cover. I've used it a few times at restaurants and also in my own home while people are over. It's not too big or bulky and is very easy to throw in your bag on the go. You can also wash it very easily. The nursing cover does just that, it covers all the right places without making you feel like you are wearing a blanket. It even has a little peep hole, so that you can keep an on eye your baby while he/she is covered up and eating. The nursing cover keeps you modest and covered, while allowing you to stay present wherever you are. The cover isn't even noticeable to most people. I've used it before and people won't even realize what I'm doing. I really like it and it allows me to breastfeed on the go!
1. Medela In Style Advanced Pump -- Whether you are planning on returning back to work or you are going to be a stay-at-home mom, I highly recommend getting a breast pump and specifically this one. The Medela In Style Advanced Pump is an awesome breast pump! I got it free through my insurance (retails $200) and it has been so helpful for me as a working mom. I recommend that you ask your health insurance if they cover a breast pump before you go out and purchase one because most companies will cover one for free! This pump is great because it's electric and a double pump meaning the pump does all the work, so I don't have to AND I can pump on both sides at once which cuts my pumping time in half. I use this pump on the days that I work, so that I can pump bottles for my baby. The pump is compact, light, and easy to bring with you wherever you go. It's super easy to use (even though it looks a little intimidating at first) and hassle-free. I also love the Medela brand because you can get everything you need for the pump (bottles, tops, nipples, etc.) at Target instead of having to order online. I think it's awesome to have a pump for when you need to leave your baby with someone or if you want daddy to be able to help out and feed baby as well. As much as I love breastfeeding, sometimes it's nice to be able to have some help and not be the sole food source. I was terrified about going back to work because I thought I would have to give up breastfeeding, but this pump has allowed me to continue on exclusively breastfeeding my son. I am so grateful I didn't have to give up breastfeeding and I owe a lot of that to this pump!
3. Lanolin nipple cream -- This cream was another lifesaver during the first few weeks of breastfeeding. Your nipples crack, bleed, and are super sensitive when they are adjusting to breastfeeding. It's painful! This cream was really helpful in making the adjustment bearable and gave me the relief I needed between feedings. The product is natural and safe for your baby to digest (inevitable if you are feeding every 2 hours). Highly recommend having this on hand BEFORE baby arrives as well. You'll thank me I promise! You can find this cream pretty much anywhere and a little goes a long way, so it lasts a long time.
4. Nursing bras -- If you are planning on breastfeeding for any length of time, you are going to want to invest in a good nursing bra. If you are currently breastfeeding, you know how often you are removing your bra. If you aren't yet, then you are about to learn! For the first month or two, your baby eats almost every two hours. It makes life much easier if you are wearing a bra that you don't have to take off or mess with each time the baby feeds. Find one that is comfortable and easy to latch off and on. I bought two nursing bras before I had Grayson and I love them both. The first one is a soft and comfy wireless bra that I wear at night or if I'm at home for the day. It's a cotton material and allows you to feed your baby very easily while keeping mom comfortable. The second bra I purchased almost looks like a regular bra with underwire but it has the latches on it that make breastfeeding extremely convenient. I needed a nursing bra with underwire for going out in public, just a personal preference. The awesome thing about this bra is that is looks and acts like a regular bra, but just makes breastfeeding a heck of a lot easier! I bought both my nursing bras at Motherhood Maternity and would recommend that store if you want a quality and comfortable nursing bra. I looked at Target and Wal-Mart for nursing bras and couldn't ever find anything that wasn't extremely uncomfortable to wear. Nursing bras are purely needed for convenience, but I think they are worth the investment. I love being able to wear a regular bra and still easily nurse my baby!
5. Nursing cover -- Before I had Grayson, I didn't know what type of mom I would be when it came to breastfeeding. I didn't think I would be the mom that breastfed in public with no cover at all, but I had no clue how comfortable I would be breastfeeding in public even with a cover. I went to a consignment sale and bought a nice Baby Balboa nursing cover for $5. I bought it just in case I needed it in the future and I am really glad I did! The cover has already come in handy so many times. I soon realized that although I don't love breastfeeding in public, I also hate leaving the group and going to sit in a room by myself for 20 minutes while everyone else is together. It wasn't always convenient to find a private (and clean) place to nurse, so I would pull out my nursing cover. I've used it a few times at restaurants and also in my own home while people are over. It's not too big or bulky and is very easy to throw in your bag on the go. You can also wash it very easily. The nursing cover does just that, it covers all the right places without making you feel like you are wearing a blanket. It even has a little peep hole, so that you can keep an on eye your baby while he/she is covered up and eating. The nursing cover keeps you modest and covered, while allowing you to stay present wherever you are. The cover isn't even noticeable to most people. I've used it before and people won't even realize what I'm doing. I really like it and it allows me to breastfeed on the go!
Monday, September 8, 2014
Saving Money on Food
Hello Readers,
Hopefully you are still with me! I haven't posted anything in a while as my life has been quite hectic. Between work, church, my husband starting his fall semester, and baby planning on the forefront of my mind, writing has taken a back seat. I did, however, want to get out a small blog post about something else that has been a priority of mine lately and that's saving money. Saving money on food that is.
My husband and I are in our mid-twenties. We both work and work hard, but at this age I feel like most of us are still in that money saving, majorly budgeting stage of life. This only gets more complicated when you are expecting a baby exactly 4 months from today (crazy!). I'm constantly trying to figure out the best way to budget our money and where we can save. Like most people, one of our biggest expenses is food, definitely not very exciting, but it is where a huge chunk of our money goes. Lately, I have found a few successful ways to save money on food. I thought I would share them today in hopes that maybe some of you are in the same "Where-Can-We-Save-Money?" battle. Here are a few tips I've learned so far!
1. Don't go grocery shopping in-between weekly trips. I don't know what you do, but I tend to go to the grocery store once a week. I'm pretty good at sticking to this, but there are usually things I forget or things that pop up during the week that I need but don't have. Lately, instead of going to the store mid-week to get those few random things that I could probably live without, I have been waiting until my weekly shop to go back to the grocery store. Only going during my specified times really helps cutting down on food cost because I'm not spending money there multiple times a week. I only go once a week. Obviously if there is something you really need, go get it. I just know I could go every day if I really wanted (we always need something), but I would end up spending much more money that way.
2. Use up what you already have. This goes off my first point. Instead of constantly buying new things once you run out, use up what you have first. This is something I've been doing more recently and it's shocking how long we can last on the food we already have without having to buy more. Lately, I've been trying to make my weekly shop very minimal and instead use up the food I already have on hand or use what I already have as the base of a recipe rather than buying all new things for a new recipe. If I run out of a particular ingredient, I see what I have on hand that would make a good substitute instead of running to the store to buy something new. This is a great way to save money and you will be surprised how much food you have built up in your pantry and freezer.
3. Only get what you NEED instead of buying ahead of time. This one all depends on sales and how much you like to plan ahead. Personally, I struggle with this one because I am a planner. If I see we are low on something, I like to go ahead and buy the replacement item immediately, so we don't run out. The problem is I find myself buying things a little too far in advance when I could wait another week to replace that item, therefore spending money before I have to. If you see something on sale or you know you will run out of it before your next shopping trip, buy it. I have just found that I can last longer without replacing items than I thought I could. I also limit what I buy to what we actually need instead of what would be nice to have. We could have 3 different kinds of chips, 4 different cereal boxes, 2 kinds of lunch meat, 3 different types of desserts and 5 pounds of ground beef, but we don't need that. I want to have choices, but only having limited choices is okay too.
4. When going out to eat -- share a plate or take a box of leftovers home with you. Josh and I rarely go out to eat, like almost never. But on the rare occasion that we do eat out, I have found a few ways to save money. Eating out can kill your wallet, I would know. Before Josh and I were married, we ate out all the time and it was such a waste of our hard earned cash. When we go out to eat now, I like to do one of two things: either share a plate of food or take half my food home and eat it as another meal. Obviously these two choices aren't always possible, but it's nice to do it when you can. We all know most restaurants give you a huge amount of food, so it's easy to share a plate with your partner or a friend. Sharing a plate means getting two meals for the price of one -- score! Another way to get two meals for the price of one is only eating half the meal and taking the rest home with you. I do this all the time. Josh and I don't really have the same food interests -- he loves pizza and I love salad, so we prefer to order separately. I am usually given much more food than I could ever finish in one sitting though. I used to let them throw away all the extra food at the end of the meal, but I have started always getting a to-go box if I have any extras. I can usually make a whole second meal out of it, therefore saving money and eating good food twice!
These are my "Saving Money on Food" tips and tricks. Sticking to these rules has allowed us to save and been very helpful for our family. These tips may seem like no-brainers to a lot of you money saving pros, but to me they are new found lessons that I felt were important enough to share. Let me know how you save money when it comes to food. I would love to hear your tips and tricks!
Hopefully you are still with me! I haven't posted anything in a while as my life has been quite hectic. Between work, church, my husband starting his fall semester, and baby planning on the forefront of my mind, writing has taken a back seat. I did, however, want to get out a small blog post about something else that has been a priority of mine lately and that's saving money. Saving money on food that is.
My husband and I are in our mid-twenties. We both work and work hard, but at this age I feel like most of us are still in that money saving, majorly budgeting stage of life. This only gets more complicated when you are expecting a baby exactly 4 months from today (crazy!). I'm constantly trying to figure out the best way to budget our money and where we can save. Like most people, one of our biggest expenses is food, definitely not very exciting, but it is where a huge chunk of our money goes. Lately, I have found a few successful ways to save money on food. I thought I would share them today in hopes that maybe some of you are in the same "Where-Can-We-Save-Money?" battle. Here are a few tips I've learned so far!
1. Don't go grocery shopping in-between weekly trips. I don't know what you do, but I tend to go to the grocery store once a week. I'm pretty good at sticking to this, but there are usually things I forget or things that pop up during the week that I need but don't have. Lately, instead of going to the store mid-week to get those few random things that I could probably live without, I have been waiting until my weekly shop to go back to the grocery store. Only going during my specified times really helps cutting down on food cost because I'm not spending money there multiple times a week. I only go once a week. Obviously if there is something you really need, go get it. I just know I could go every day if I really wanted (we always need something), but I would end up spending much more money that way.
2. Use up what you already have. This goes off my first point. Instead of constantly buying new things once you run out, use up what you have first. This is something I've been doing more recently and it's shocking how long we can last on the food we already have without having to buy more. Lately, I've been trying to make my weekly shop very minimal and instead use up the food I already have on hand or use what I already have as the base of a recipe rather than buying all new things for a new recipe. If I run out of a particular ingredient, I see what I have on hand that would make a good substitute instead of running to the store to buy something new. This is a great way to save money and you will be surprised how much food you have built up in your pantry and freezer.
3. Only get what you NEED instead of buying ahead of time. This one all depends on sales and how much you like to plan ahead. Personally, I struggle with this one because I am a planner. If I see we are low on something, I like to go ahead and buy the replacement item immediately, so we don't run out. The problem is I find myself buying things a little too far in advance when I could wait another week to replace that item, therefore spending money before I have to. If you see something on sale or you know you will run out of it before your next shopping trip, buy it. I have just found that I can last longer without replacing items than I thought I could. I also limit what I buy to what we actually need instead of what would be nice to have. We could have 3 different kinds of chips, 4 different cereal boxes, 2 kinds of lunch meat, 3 different types of desserts and 5 pounds of ground beef, but we don't need that. I want to have choices, but only having limited choices is okay too.
4. When going out to eat -- share a plate or take a box of leftovers home with you. Josh and I rarely go out to eat, like almost never. But on the rare occasion that we do eat out, I have found a few ways to save money. Eating out can kill your wallet, I would know. Before Josh and I were married, we ate out all the time and it was such a waste of our hard earned cash. When we go out to eat now, I like to do one of two things: either share a plate of food or take half my food home and eat it as another meal. Obviously these two choices aren't always possible, but it's nice to do it when you can. We all know most restaurants give you a huge amount of food, so it's easy to share a plate with your partner or a friend. Sharing a plate means getting two meals for the price of one -- score! Another way to get two meals for the price of one is only eating half the meal and taking the rest home with you. I do this all the time. Josh and I don't really have the same food interests -- he loves pizza and I love salad, so we prefer to order separately. I am usually given much more food than I could ever finish in one sitting though. I used to let them throw away all the extra food at the end of the meal, but I have started always getting a to-go box if I have any extras. I can usually make a whole second meal out of it, therefore saving money and eating good food twice!
These are my "Saving Money on Food" tips and tricks. Sticking to these rules has allowed us to save and been very helpful for our family. These tips may seem like no-brainers to a lot of you money saving pros, but to me they are new found lessons that I felt were important enough to share. Let me know how you save money when it comes to food. I would love to hear your tips and tricks!
Tuesday, July 22, 2014
Meal Planning 101
So a bunch of you have requested that I write a blog about meal planning. Little do you know that I am far from an expert and am still learning myself, but I will share some tips and tricks that have worked for me along the way.
As ya'll probably know, in January of this year I made the resolution to cook more and cook better. I was a complete newbie in the kitchen and was really starting from scratch. Now that the year is about half way over (I can't believe it!), I can say I have seen major improvements in myself and my cooking abilities. I have been consistent in cooking, trying new recipes and using different ingredients and kitchen tools that I wasn't always familiar with. But, so far cooking for my family has been a success! I contribute a lot of that success to meal planning.
By nature I am a very organized person, but I had never carried that over to my cooking world. It didn't take me long to realize that if I was going to do this cooking thing the right way, I needed create a method to my madness. If I wanted my meals to actually be something I was proud of, then I needed to take the time to invest in cooking instead of just throwing it together last minute. If that works for you, then great! I'm the kind of person who thrives on organization and lists, so this is what works for me.
1. I tend to meal plan by month (keep in mind that I am only cooking for 2, which is much different than cooking for 5 plus). Meal planning each month allows me more free time. I don't have to scramble each night to find a recipe then hope I have everything on hand. When I don't know exactly what to make, I refer back to my monthly list which gives me plenty of ideas.
2. I start by doing a lot of research on different meals and things I want to make. I go to all different websites, Pinterest, cook books, etc. and I create a solid list of meals for the upcoming month. I find a few crockpot meals, a few meals I feel comfortable with and a few meals that make me a little uncomfortable. If I always stuck with my comfort zone when it came to cooking, then it would be cereal all the way, so I force myself to go outside my box. The key is to plan a variety of meals, so that you aren't sick of eating the same type of stuff by the end of the month. The websites that I love to find recipes on are www.sixsistersstuff.com, thefrugalgirls.com, and Pinterest. I also have a few cookbooks that I really like. You have to find what type of recipes work for you. I personally stick to fairly simple recipes with fewer ingredients that can be made in a short amount of time due to my busy schedule which is why those particular cooking websites work best for me. If you dedicate time once a month to researching meals, you won't have to think about finding new meals to make again until the next month. It's a lot better than having to do that research each night or even each week in my opinion.
3. Once you have your list of meals established, you go shopping! I do a weekly shop, so I get what I need for the meals I am planning on cooking that particular week. I don't cook a full dinner every night though, so my shopping cart isn't overflowing. Since there are only 2 of us, I usually make a regular sized meal and easily have left-overs. Although a lot of people don't love leftovers (I used to be one of them), it's an easy way to save money and make sure food isn't going to waste. So each week I go shopping for the meals I will be cooking that week and I am armed with a list. Again, I put a lot of time into staying organized and it keeps me on track and focused at the grocery store. If I need ingredients for 3-4 meals and I don't have an organized list, it will be a disaster. I check everything off my list and I go home with everything I need instead of forgetting half of it and having to go back.
4. The next step is cooking! I have found that when I already have everything on hand and ready to go that cooking is so much easier. I'm not stressed running around the kitchen trying to find out if I even have what I need to pull this meal together. I know what I need and I know I have it. I pull it all out at once and get to cooking. I also buy meat in bulk and freeze it which helps with meal planning. Just make sure to defrost the meat beforehand, so that you can easily pop it in the oven instead of having to get it defrosted. (Again, it takes time to plan to defrost it ahead of time, but it will save you time in the end!)
5. The last step is timing. One of the biggest keys to successfully meal planning is to know your schedule and know what meals work best for your family on different days. My husband and I know our schedules somewhat in advance and I try to plan meals around that. On the weekends, I usually cook crockpot meals because I am at home for longer periods during the day and actually have time to make a 6 hr. crockpot dish whereas during the week I am gone for almost 12 hours each day which would make a crockpot meal hard to manage. On days where I know I have to work late, I usually cook a big meal the night before. That way there are leftovers for when I am working late and I don't have to run home and stress about cooking. On nights where we have nothing going on after work, I have time to cook the meal that takes 30 minutes to prepare and involves a lot of chopping. On nights where we have church almost an hour after I get home from work, I opt for a quick and easy dinner. This is why having a variety of recipes on hand is helpful! Know yourself and figure out what meals work best for you depending on the situation...this will be a lifesaver.
So there you have it, my mini Meal Planning 101 class! Meal Planning is a lot of work, but for me it's been the thing that keeps me sane while preparing and cooking meals for my family. Organization really does make cooking for your family much easier and less stressful. I have started to really enjoy researching meals and it's become fun to challenge myself with new dishes to make. This is just what works for me and my family and is by no means a perfected guide, but hopefully you learned something new and we can all continue on this journey of cooking together. I would love to hear what works for you and if you have any tips for me!
I'm going to include some delicious recipes that I have tried recently if you are looking for new ideas!
As ya'll probably know, in January of this year I made the resolution to cook more and cook better. I was a complete newbie in the kitchen and was really starting from scratch. Now that the year is about half way over (I can't believe it!), I can say I have seen major improvements in myself and my cooking abilities. I have been consistent in cooking, trying new recipes and using different ingredients and kitchen tools that I wasn't always familiar with. But, so far cooking for my family has been a success! I contribute a lot of that success to meal planning.
By nature I am a very organized person, but I had never carried that over to my cooking world. It didn't take me long to realize that if I was going to do this cooking thing the right way, I needed create a method to my madness. If I wanted my meals to actually be something I was proud of, then I needed to take the time to invest in cooking instead of just throwing it together last minute. If that works for you, then great! I'm the kind of person who thrives on organization and lists, so this is what works for me.
1. I tend to meal plan by month (keep in mind that I am only cooking for 2, which is much different than cooking for 5 plus). Meal planning each month allows me more free time. I don't have to scramble each night to find a recipe then hope I have everything on hand. When I don't know exactly what to make, I refer back to my monthly list which gives me plenty of ideas.
2. I start by doing a lot of research on different meals and things I want to make. I go to all different websites, Pinterest, cook books, etc. and I create a solid list of meals for the upcoming month. I find a few crockpot meals, a few meals I feel comfortable with and a few meals that make me a little uncomfortable. If I always stuck with my comfort zone when it came to cooking, then it would be cereal all the way, so I force myself to go outside my box. The key is to plan a variety of meals, so that you aren't sick of eating the same type of stuff by the end of the month. The websites that I love to find recipes on are www.sixsistersstuff.com, thefrugalgirls.com, and Pinterest. I also have a few cookbooks that I really like. You have to find what type of recipes work for you. I personally stick to fairly simple recipes with fewer ingredients that can be made in a short amount of time due to my busy schedule which is why those particular cooking websites work best for me. If you dedicate time once a month to researching meals, you won't have to think about finding new meals to make again until the next month. It's a lot better than having to do that research each night or even each week in my opinion.
3. Once you have your list of meals established, you go shopping! I do a weekly shop, so I get what I need for the meals I am planning on cooking that particular week. I don't cook a full dinner every night though, so my shopping cart isn't overflowing. Since there are only 2 of us, I usually make a regular sized meal and easily have left-overs. Although a lot of people don't love leftovers (I used to be one of them), it's an easy way to save money and make sure food isn't going to waste. So each week I go shopping for the meals I will be cooking that week and I am armed with a list. Again, I put a lot of time into staying organized and it keeps me on track and focused at the grocery store. If I need ingredients for 3-4 meals and I don't have an organized list, it will be a disaster. I check everything off my list and I go home with everything I need instead of forgetting half of it and having to go back.
4. The next step is cooking! I have found that when I already have everything on hand and ready to go that cooking is so much easier. I'm not stressed running around the kitchen trying to find out if I even have what I need to pull this meal together. I know what I need and I know I have it. I pull it all out at once and get to cooking. I also buy meat in bulk and freeze it which helps with meal planning. Just make sure to defrost the meat beforehand, so that you can easily pop it in the oven instead of having to get it defrosted. (Again, it takes time to plan to defrost it ahead of time, but it will save you time in the end!)
5. The last step is timing. One of the biggest keys to successfully meal planning is to know your schedule and know what meals work best for your family on different days. My husband and I know our schedules somewhat in advance and I try to plan meals around that. On the weekends, I usually cook crockpot meals because I am at home for longer periods during the day and actually have time to make a 6 hr. crockpot dish whereas during the week I am gone for almost 12 hours each day which would make a crockpot meal hard to manage. On days where I know I have to work late, I usually cook a big meal the night before. That way there are leftovers for when I am working late and I don't have to run home and stress about cooking. On nights where we have nothing going on after work, I have time to cook the meal that takes 30 minutes to prepare and involves a lot of chopping. On nights where we have church almost an hour after I get home from work, I opt for a quick and easy dinner. This is why having a variety of recipes on hand is helpful! Know yourself and figure out what meals work best for you depending on the situation...this will be a lifesaver.
So there you have it, my mini Meal Planning 101 class! Meal Planning is a lot of work, but for me it's been the thing that keeps me sane while preparing and cooking meals for my family. Organization really does make cooking for your family much easier and less stressful. I have started to really enjoy researching meals and it's become fun to challenge myself with new dishes to make. This is just what works for me and my family and is by no means a perfected guide, but hopefully you learned something new and we can all continue on this journey of cooking together. I would love to hear what works for you and if you have any tips for me!
I'm going to include some delicious recipes that I have tried recently if you are looking for new ideas!
http://www.sixsistersstuff.
http://thefrugalgirls.com/2013/09/crockpot-stove-top-chicken.html
http://thefrugalgirls.com/2013/09/crockpot-stove-top-chicken.html
Tuesday, April 15, 2014
My Library -- Book Recommendations
Hey guys! I'm back for another blog post. I have been trying
to switch things up lately and write about a variety of topics. Today I decided
that I wanted to share my current library with you. This is only a small
portion of my entire collection of books, but these are the books that I have
read in the last 6 months. I have read a few of them on my own and a few of
them with a group (my Bible study and Sunday School class). Either way, I would
highly recommend all of these books and believe that they will strengthen your
walk with the Lord. So, let me tell you about each of them!
My Sunday School class has been on a C. S. Lewis kick this
year. We have read a few of his books and we started out the year reading
through the Chronicles of Narnia series. Many of you may have read this classic
series as children. I know I read a few of the books growing up. The awesome
thing about C. S. Lewis is that he can write novels that appeal to both
children and adults. His words carry weight although presented in a simple
fashion. As our class read through each book, we were amazed at how he weaved the
words together to really dig deep into the Christian faith. The books were
beautifully written in order to challenge the adult mind to see God within
these children's stories. Each book displays a different part of the Bible
including creation, the redemption story, and Heaven. It really challenged my
class to find the meaning behind the pictures he builds throughout his stories.
We used the study guide pictured above to navigate our discussions throughout
the books and also reveal truths that we may not have seen otherwise. I would
highly recommend this series and I think you will be surprised by how much you
fall in love with not only the characters, but also Lewis' style of writing.
Next is Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers. If you haven't
heard of this book, I would honestly be surprised. This book came to me with
very high recommendations and was actually a gift from my husband (he had also
heard great things). The book starts out in an odd fashion if you are expecting
the traditional cookie cutter Christian novel. It is Biblically based though
and actually focuses on the story of Hosea. It starts off with an emotionally
and physically beaten down girl named Angel who makes a living as a prostitute.
She has no self-worth and a very ugly past. A man named Michael Hosea sees her
one night and feels God telling him to marry this girl. He is immediately very
confused and doesn't want much to do with Angel based on her outer appearance
and her lifestyle. Michael ends up obeying God and marrying her and from there,
things take a turn for the crazy. All sorts of events happen and many that are
very surprising. This is a very, very powerful story of redemption. I know I
personally started tearing up while reading it because of the way it shows God's unconditional love for us. I would say this is a must read for any woman and is
a great example of God's extravagant, over the top, beyond anything we could
ever understand, love for us. This book keeps you on your toes the entire time!
This book is an oldie, but goodie. Its Beth Moore's Breaking Free. If you aren't familiar with Beth Moore, then you are missing out. She is a phenomenal teacher especially when it comes to women's studies. I actually read this book a few years ago and it came at the perfect time for me, a time where I was feeling very captivated and almost trapped by certain strongholds in my life. I reread this book recently and was surprised at how much I got out of it considering I had already gone through it once. Breaking Free is about the obvious: breaking free from the things that hold us captive and finding freedom in Christ. But this book also offers more healing than you would expect and dives into exploring the abundant life God intends for us. The book goes through the benefits and challenges to finding our liberty in Jesus, our past and how to mend our wounds for the future, obedience through the obstacles, God's unfailing love, and the joy that comes with freedom. This book is full of encouragement and you can only walk away from it feeling God's presence and fullness in your life. I personally really connected with this particular Beth Moore writing, but I find that most everything she puts out is something worth reading.
Like I said, my Sunday School class is very into C. S. Lewis
right now. That being said, they chose to read Mere Christianity after reading
the Chronicles of Narnia. I'm not going to lie, I was a little concerned that
we would all go into a Lewis coma and be quickly burnt out by reading another Lewis
book, but I was pleasantly surprised. This is probably one of my top favorite
Christian books. It is so good. This
book is different than the Narnia series because he is talking directly about
his faith instead of using characters and stories to portray it. These
"talks" by Lewis were originally done on the radio in the 1940’s. He
was asked to share little segments about faith every week and to explain why he
thought Christianity was the way to go. In some ways, Mere Christianity is like
an apologetics book (defending a position through the use of information).
Lewis defends Christianity and explains how it works. What makes this book
really interesting is that Lewis was not always a Christian. He didn't convert
until later in his life, so hearing his position on Christianity and
non-believers is a unique and inspiring one. He writes in such a captivating
way and he explains a religion that can be a tangled web with a completely
simplistic approach. He uses logic to explain Christianity in such a profound
and powerful way. I can't recommend this book enough!
The last book is my most recent read and I am not quite
finished with it yet. I am part of a girl's Bible study and we are currently
reading Spiritual Disciplines for the Christian Life by Donald Whitney. The
book focuses on 11 spiritual disciples and each chapter entails why this
discipline is important to our faith. Obviously, discipline isn't the most fun
topic to discuss and it's rarely easy, but Whitney reveals that discipline
actually brings freedom. This book has exceeded my expectations so far and
challenged my walk. It is a great catalyst for discussions and has allowed me
to dig deeper into my faith. So far we have discussed the discipline of Bible
Intake, Prayer, Worship and Evangelism and I have yet to be disappointed. If
you are looking for a challenge and a way to grow in your spiritual life, this
book is for you!
Thanks for sticking with me on this journey through
literature. I hope you enjoyed learning more about what is in my library and that
you will pick up one of these great books in the future. I promise you will not
be disappointed!
Tuesday, April 8, 2014
"God Made Dirt, Dirt Don't Hurt"
Happy Tuesday, everyone! If you live in Georgia, then I'm sure you are doing the happy dance right along with me because the sun is out today! After a gloomy, stormy day yesterday, it is refreshing and encouraging to see some sunshine.
This weekend was quite a busy one for me and I got a lot done. My biggest accomplishment by far was cleaning the house. I don't say the world cleaning lightly. To be more accurate, I should probably say I spent all of Saturday scrubbing the house. I am the kind of person who likes organization and for everything to be in its place. I don't like things on the floors and I can say that most of the time my house is picked up and not a disaster zone. But, I don't enjoy actually cleaning: wiping things off, vacuuming, mopping, sweeping, getting down on my hands and knees and scrubbing the bathroom, etc. Nope, that's not really my thing. One of the joys of our new home is the space while one of the challenges of our new home is the space. We love having more room, but every wife knows the more space you have, the more there is to clean. Let's just say I haven't made this "deep cleaning" thing a ritual or a weekly ordeal. I definitely should, but I'm just not there yet. With all that being said, although the laundry was done and everything around the house was picked up, I was shocked at how long it took me to clean a seemingly put together home. I literally cleaned every surface of our house (knowing that it will be some time before this "spring cleaning fever" strikes again). Throughout my cleaning venture, I discovered my house was a lot dirtier than I expected and the process of really getting the house to really "shine" was much more time consuming than I would have guessed.
The process of "deep cleaning" my house reminded so much of life, especially our spiritual lives. How often do we breeze through without taking the time to focus on the details? It's easier to skip over the mess and hard work that we know would be involved in cleaning it up. You can glance at your spiritual life like I glanced around my house and convince yourself that there's nothing more to be done, but we all know that's not true. It takes courage and honesty to take a self-inventory of our spiritual lives and it's scary to see what we might find. We know that God is calling us to dip deeper and push harder, but that requires facing what can sometimes be a dirty mess.We would rather go on in ignorant bliss than deal with all the emotions and fears that lie within those crevasses and cracks. God is challenging us to stop going through the motions and really let Him prune us and put us through the fire, so that we can come out molded into something even better on the other side. Exposing the buildup of gunk in your life to God is scary, but that's where the blessing is. We don't want Him to be like a guest in our house and pile all of the junk under the bed before He comes over. We need to be transparent about our spiritual lives with the Lord in order to be transformed. In the Bible it says that God "makes beauty from ashes". He takes the "dirt" in our lives and turns it into something beautiful. He looks at the things we aren't proud of, the things we regret, and the things we aren't very good at and then smiles at us, reassuring us that He loves us no matter what. That love is what makes us whole again. That love is what cleanses and renews us. Only God has the power to do that. Hiding those darker spots in our lives won't give God the opportunity to do something great with them.
Like I said, it's easy to go through the motions when it comes to your faith. It's easy to do the parts that come easily for you and avoid steps of faith that you know will be hard and require work. It's easy to hide from the "dirt" in our lives without ever exposing it to God because we just don't want to deal with it. And it was easy for me to go on for months glancing at my house convincing myself that it was "clean". I knew how much work it would require to get it where it needed to be. I knew I would find spots along that way that I wasn't proud of. I knew I would find more dirt than I cared to see. But at the end of my Saturday, my house looked good! After a lot of scrubbing and accepting that I really don't do it as much as I need to, those dirty spots were washed away. The awesome thing about Jesus is that the hard work is only found in getting up the guts to share our whole selves with Him, dirt and all. After that, He does the work. He loves us. He accepts us. He transforms us. All we have to be is willing to "clean our house".
This weekend was quite a busy one for me and I got a lot done. My biggest accomplishment by far was cleaning the house. I don't say the world cleaning lightly. To be more accurate, I should probably say I spent all of Saturday scrubbing the house. I am the kind of person who likes organization and for everything to be in its place. I don't like things on the floors and I can say that most of the time my house is picked up and not a disaster zone. But, I don't enjoy actually cleaning: wiping things off, vacuuming, mopping, sweeping, getting down on my hands and knees and scrubbing the bathroom, etc. Nope, that's not really my thing. One of the joys of our new home is the space while one of the challenges of our new home is the space. We love having more room, but every wife knows the more space you have, the more there is to clean. Let's just say I haven't made this "deep cleaning" thing a ritual or a weekly ordeal. I definitely should, but I'm just not there yet. With all that being said, although the laundry was done and everything around the house was picked up, I was shocked at how long it took me to clean a seemingly put together home. I literally cleaned every surface of our house (knowing that it will be some time before this "spring cleaning fever" strikes again). Throughout my cleaning venture, I discovered my house was a lot dirtier than I expected and the process of really getting the house to really "shine" was much more time consuming than I would have guessed.
The process of "deep cleaning" my house reminded so much of life, especially our spiritual lives. How often do we breeze through without taking the time to focus on the details? It's easier to skip over the mess and hard work that we know would be involved in cleaning it up. You can glance at your spiritual life like I glanced around my house and convince yourself that there's nothing more to be done, but we all know that's not true. It takes courage and honesty to take a self-inventory of our spiritual lives and it's scary to see what we might find. We know that God is calling us to dip deeper and push harder, but that requires facing what can sometimes be a dirty mess.We would rather go on in ignorant bliss than deal with all the emotions and fears that lie within those crevasses and cracks. God is challenging us to stop going through the motions and really let Him prune us and put us through the fire, so that we can come out molded into something even better on the other side. Exposing the buildup of gunk in your life to God is scary, but that's where the blessing is. We don't want Him to be like a guest in our house and pile all of the junk under the bed before He comes over. We need to be transparent about our spiritual lives with the Lord in order to be transformed. In the Bible it says that God "makes beauty from ashes". He takes the "dirt" in our lives and turns it into something beautiful. He looks at the things we aren't proud of, the things we regret, and the things we aren't very good at and then smiles at us, reassuring us that He loves us no matter what. That love is what makes us whole again. That love is what cleanses and renews us. Only God has the power to do that. Hiding those darker spots in our lives won't give God the opportunity to do something great with them.
Like I said, it's easy to go through the motions when it comes to your faith. It's easy to do the parts that come easily for you and avoid steps of faith that you know will be hard and require work. It's easy to hide from the "dirt" in our lives without ever exposing it to God because we just don't want to deal with it. And it was easy for me to go on for months glancing at my house convincing myself that it was "clean". I knew how much work it would require to get it where it needed to be. I knew I would find spots along that way that I wasn't proud of. I knew I would find more dirt than I cared to see. But at the end of my Saturday, my house looked good! After a lot of scrubbing and accepting that I really don't do it as much as I need to, those dirty spots were washed away. The awesome thing about Jesus is that the hard work is only found in getting up the guts to share our whole selves with Him, dirt and all. After that, He does the work. He loves us. He accepts us. He transforms us. All we have to be is willing to "clean our house".
Wednesday, February 19, 2014
"I Need To Be Skinnier"
I haven't written too much about health on this blog, but being healthy and in shape is a big part of my life. I've had my ups and downs with weight over the years. I've gone through very healthy and somewhat unhealthy phases. If you are a woman reading this, then I feel like you will be able to relate on some level. Women constantly worry about weight and appearance. The older we get, the worse this obsession becomes. I see so many women going to extremes to achieve their goal weight or a certain look. It makes me sick to watch. I'm here to share my personal health journey and hope that it will inspire some of you to see that leading a healthy life doesn't have to be all about counting calories and spending countless hours in the gym. It takes some self-love and dedication to not becoming skinny, but becoming healthy (physically AND mentally).
From the time I was young, I have always worried about weight. I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism at age 11 and was considered overweight for my age at that point. Before my diagnosis, I just thought I was rapidly gaining weight and can remember being conscious of what I put into my body at an early age. In the 3rd grade, I started drinking water instead of juice. I tried to eat more fruits and vegetables and to cut out sweets. I was already trying to "diet" because I didn't like how I looked. After I got on the right medication, the pounds began to shed and I got back to my natural weight.
I was on the track and cross county teams in middle and high school, so I was constantly running. That definitely helped me stay in shape in my teens, but I still stayed close to the scale to constantly check my weight. I have always eaten fairly healthy and had a love for healthy foods. I also have a love for sweets. So when I got to college, I was amazed by the plethora of food I saw everywhere. I had a 24/7 access pass to the dining hall and went out to eat Waffle House in the middle of the night regularly with friends. The pounds started coming back on. I didn't realize it at the time, but I was my heaviest in college. I would work out regularly, but I would also binge eat and go to bed extremely full on a regular basis. I overate and believed I needed way too many calories to keep my body going. I was truly uneducated about what being healthy really meant.
My senior year of college after Christmas break, I decided I needed to go on a "diet". My weight was at an all-time high and I wanted to get down to what I had been in high school. I started eating healthy and working out, but I was a bit obsessive about it. I went to the gym 5-6 days a week in college and felt like something was off if I wasn't there. I thought I needed to be there in order to not gain weight. While this isn't a crazy extreme, my mindset was unhealthy. A few weeks before graduation, I reached my goal weight. But looking back, I didn't do it in the healthiest way. I wasn't consuming enough calories and was pushing myself to the limit. I believed that if I just ate less, then I wouldn't have to work out as much and I could still be "skinny". While that was true, it was difficult to maintain. I gained some of the weight back after graduation and it was hard to step on that scale.
When I got engaged, I started losing weight again, not on purpose this time but because of stress and busyness. I began eating slightly less calories but also letting myself indulge. I didn't feel like I was depriving myself anymore. I was working out, but only 3 days a week, nothing extreme. It was through that method and putting less focus on weight than I ever had, that I got to my skinniest and healthiest state. Pretty ironic, huh?
I'm not saying this method works for everyone, but I can say that I have been able to maintain a weight I am very happy with while still being healthy for almost a year and a half. I work out, but I don't live at the gym. I eat healthy, but I also eat unhealthy sometimes. I am not constantly counting calories. Everything in moderation is my new personal slogan. I have seen a change in my body and my mind by putting less emphasis on the scale and more on being a happier person all around. I am happier, healthier, and skinnier when I take the pressure off of myself and decrease my intensity with trying to be thin. I changed my focus and it worked.
I was inspired to write this particular blog after constantly seeing women who hate on themselves and who put every ounce of their being into reaching their goal weight. Even if you look on Pinterest, there are a million recipes on how to make things differently to cut calories. I think healthy choices are very important, but eating a little less of something with a higher calorie content and feeling satisfied instead of deprived is okay too. Don't get caught up in everything "diet" and "skinny". Eat a piece of cake, just don't eat 5. Depriving yourself is NOT the solution to a healthy life, but loving yourself is. Everywhere we look; there is pressure to be smaller, to push ourselves, our bodies, and our minds to the extreme. Moderation is key. Lifestyle changes are more effective than diets. Eat in moderation, workout in moderation, and dedicate your time and energy to being thinner in moderation. The scale may not look different, but that doesn't mean that you aren't getting results. Throw the scale out if you have to in order to focus on being healthy (physically and mentally) not skinny. You will be a much healthier and happier person in the long run.
From the time I was young, I have always worried about weight. I was diagnosed with hypothyroidism at age 11 and was considered overweight for my age at that point. Before my diagnosis, I just thought I was rapidly gaining weight and can remember being conscious of what I put into my body at an early age. In the 3rd grade, I started drinking water instead of juice. I tried to eat more fruits and vegetables and to cut out sweets. I was already trying to "diet" because I didn't like how I looked. After I got on the right medication, the pounds began to shed and I got back to my natural weight.
I was on the track and cross county teams in middle and high school, so I was constantly running. That definitely helped me stay in shape in my teens, but I still stayed close to the scale to constantly check my weight. I have always eaten fairly healthy and had a love for healthy foods. I also have a love for sweets. So when I got to college, I was amazed by the plethora of food I saw everywhere. I had a 24/7 access pass to the dining hall and went out to eat Waffle House in the middle of the night regularly with friends. The pounds started coming back on. I didn't realize it at the time, but I was my heaviest in college. I would work out regularly, but I would also binge eat and go to bed extremely full on a regular basis. I overate and believed I needed way too many calories to keep my body going. I was truly uneducated about what being healthy really meant.
My senior year of college after Christmas break, I decided I needed to go on a "diet". My weight was at an all-time high and I wanted to get down to what I had been in high school. I started eating healthy and working out, but I was a bit obsessive about it. I went to the gym 5-6 days a week in college and felt like something was off if I wasn't there. I thought I needed to be there in order to not gain weight. While this isn't a crazy extreme, my mindset was unhealthy. A few weeks before graduation, I reached my goal weight. But looking back, I didn't do it in the healthiest way. I wasn't consuming enough calories and was pushing myself to the limit. I believed that if I just ate less, then I wouldn't have to work out as much and I could still be "skinny". While that was true, it was difficult to maintain. I gained some of the weight back after graduation and it was hard to step on that scale.
When I got engaged, I started losing weight again, not on purpose this time but because of stress and busyness. I began eating slightly less calories but also letting myself indulge. I didn't feel like I was depriving myself anymore. I was working out, but only 3 days a week, nothing extreme. It was through that method and putting less focus on weight than I ever had, that I got to my skinniest and healthiest state. Pretty ironic, huh?
I'm not saying this method works for everyone, but I can say that I have been able to maintain a weight I am very happy with while still being healthy for almost a year and a half. I work out, but I don't live at the gym. I eat healthy, but I also eat unhealthy sometimes. I am not constantly counting calories. Everything in moderation is my new personal slogan. I have seen a change in my body and my mind by putting less emphasis on the scale and more on being a happier person all around. I am happier, healthier, and skinnier when I take the pressure off of myself and decrease my intensity with trying to be thin. I changed my focus and it worked.
I was inspired to write this particular blog after constantly seeing women who hate on themselves and who put every ounce of their being into reaching their goal weight. Even if you look on Pinterest, there are a million recipes on how to make things differently to cut calories. I think healthy choices are very important, but eating a little less of something with a higher calorie content and feeling satisfied instead of deprived is okay too. Don't get caught up in everything "diet" and "skinny". Eat a piece of cake, just don't eat 5. Depriving yourself is NOT the solution to a healthy life, but loving yourself is. Everywhere we look; there is pressure to be smaller, to push ourselves, our bodies, and our minds to the extreme. Moderation is key. Lifestyle changes are more effective than diets. Eat in moderation, workout in moderation, and dedicate your time and energy to being thinner in moderation. The scale may not look different, but that doesn't mean that you aren't getting results. Throw the scale out if you have to in order to focus on being healthy (physically and mentally) not skinny. You will be a much healthier and happier person in the long run.
Monday, November 18, 2013
The First Married Year
I can't believe that my husband and I have almost been married 1 year already! In some respects, it feels like just yesterday and in others, it feels like we've been together forever. I can definitely say that our first year of marriage has been one for the books where we grew in love, knowledge, and wisdom of how to be a good spouse to one another. I do not claim to know as much as someone who has been married for 25+ years, but I can say I have learned quite a few things during our first year together as husband and wife. This is by far not everything, but a few good nuggets of truth and encouragement that can help every engaged or newlywed couple make their marriage a more successful and happy one.
1. Loving your spouse is a daily choice -- if you believe that love is an emotion in your marriage, then there will be times where you don't "feel" loving towards your spouse. You can't base your love for your spouse on how you are feeling that day or how they are acting. On those days where you have to pick up their dirty laundry off the floor and take out the trash because they forgot again, you must choose to love them anyways.
2. Be silly together.
3. Even though you now live together, take the time to go on a date and spend time alone together out of the house.
4. Life can get stressful very quickly -- laugh together, as much and as often as you can.
5. Do little things for each other. Surprise each other.
6. Compliment each other -- your spouse needs that reminder that you still find them attractive.
7. Start traditions together.
8. Celebrate the small accomplishments together.
9. Encourage your spouse daily -- they need your constant support whether they act like it or not.
10. Forgive easily and quickly -- holding on to a grudge towards the person who you will spend the rest of your life with is going to be miserable for everyone.
11. You aren't the perfect spouse so don't expect them to be -- they are learning what marriage is all about right there alongside you.
12. Be selfless -- make their lunch, do something sweet for them, clean up after them, even if they haven't done that for you recently. Do it anyways.
13. Love them unconditionally -- don't let your actions towards your spouse be based on their actions towards you. Show them unconditional love even if they may not "deserve" it that day.
14. Be affectionate towards each other -- don't be afraid of public displays of affection. You are married now and it will probably make your spouse feel special.
15. Words can hurt and can never be taken back. Be careful of what you say to each other. Think about what you say and the impact it will have on your marriage before you say it. You will make your marriage a much happier thing if you just think before you speak.
16. Make your spouse feel special -- in all the busyness of life, it's easy to forget to do this, but it's important.
17. Never walk out during a fight.
18. Make couple friends.
19. Find a mentor that has been successful in their marriage and can offer you wisdom and guidance when you need it -- you will need it.
20. Respect and love your spouse's family -- they are your family now too.
21. Respect the way your spouse deals with stress or conflict -- forcing them handle it your way isn't going to work.
22. Tell your spouse you love them. All the time. More importantly, show your spouse you love them. Actions speak louder than words.
1. Loving your spouse is a daily choice -- if you believe that love is an emotion in your marriage, then there will be times where you don't "feel" loving towards your spouse. You can't base your love for your spouse on how you are feeling that day or how they are acting. On those days where you have to pick up their dirty laundry off the floor and take out the trash because they forgot again, you must choose to love them anyways.
2. Be silly together.
3. Even though you now live together, take the time to go on a date and spend time alone together out of the house.
4. Life can get stressful very quickly -- laugh together, as much and as often as you can.
5. Do little things for each other. Surprise each other.
6. Compliment each other -- your spouse needs that reminder that you still find them attractive.
7. Start traditions together.
8. Celebrate the small accomplishments together.
9. Encourage your spouse daily -- they need your constant support whether they act like it or not.
10. Forgive easily and quickly -- holding on to a grudge towards the person who you will spend the rest of your life with is going to be miserable for everyone.
11. You aren't the perfect spouse so don't expect them to be -- they are learning what marriage is all about right there alongside you.
12. Be selfless -- make their lunch, do something sweet for them, clean up after them, even if they haven't done that for you recently. Do it anyways.
13. Love them unconditionally -- don't let your actions towards your spouse be based on their actions towards you. Show them unconditional love even if they may not "deserve" it that day.
14. Be affectionate towards each other -- don't be afraid of public displays of affection. You are married now and it will probably make your spouse feel special.
15. Words can hurt and can never be taken back. Be careful of what you say to each other. Think about what you say and the impact it will have on your marriage before you say it. You will make your marriage a much happier thing if you just think before you speak.
16. Make your spouse feel special -- in all the busyness of life, it's easy to forget to do this, but it's important.
17. Never walk out during a fight.
18. Make couple friends.
19. Find a mentor that has been successful in their marriage and can offer you wisdom and guidance when you need it -- you will need it.
20. Respect and love your spouse's family -- they are your family now too.
21. Respect the way your spouse deals with stress or conflict -- forcing them handle it your way isn't going to work.
22. Tell your spouse you love them. All the time. More importantly, show your spouse you love them. Actions speak louder than words.
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