How Do I Deal With Stress?

Happy Monday, everyone! Is today the epitome of a Monday morning or what?! If you are in the Atlanta area, then you know the monsoon-like weather, crazy traffic jams, and time change adjustment that I am speaking of. Not exactly the most relaxing start to the week! If you are feeling a little overwhelmed, on edge, or just straight up tired this Monday morning, then this post is especially for you! We all have stress in our lives, whether that be Monday morning on a busy week type stress or just everyday life stress. We may think that stress limits itself to those who have a mortgage to pay or food to put on the table or 5 little kids running around, but in fact, stress encompasses all ages. Even our youth are experiencing more stress than we probably did at their age. I found that out last week as I was preparing the lesson for our youth girl's Bible study. I've been part of this particular girl's middle and high school Bible study at our church for almost 2.5 years now. I love investing in young girl's lives especially at this fragile age of peer pressure, awkward middle school years (wasn't it for everyone?!) and coming into your own. I wish I had someone who would have been able to pour spiritual truth and guidance into my life at this age, so I get pretty excited do be able to do that for someone else.

Once in a while, I teach the lesson for the week and this time around, I asked the girls what they wanted me to talk about and what would help them the most. Each week, these girls come to our Bible study with burdens, stresses, and anxiety. They have so much going on in their lives at such a young age and each week they are overwhelmed and just worn out. So to no surprise, they asked me to talk about managing stress and negativity! I thought this was pretty ironic because anyone who knows me knows that I am a very easily stressed individual. I deal with anxiety regularly and usually seem like a little bit of a crazy person compared to my cool-as-a-cucumber, thrives on procrastination, "everything will work out, just relax", scatterbrained but somehow always pulls it off last minute husband. He thrives on the unplanned, spontaneous, and natural eb and flow of life while I retreat to a corner and get out my paper bag to calm my breathing during the potential panic attack that most likely is arising in me during the chaos and confusion of life. Type A personalities unite! God has been teaching me for years about managing stress in my life and it's a constant work in progress for me because I am a natural worrier. Isn't that always how it works though? God uses our weaknesses and stories of restoration to help others by showing them what He's taught us. He rescues us, so that we can then go and rescue others dealing with similar issues. So after some thinking about past experiences and rereading a few posts I've written in this space from the past, I came up with a short list of ways to help deal with stress. This list doesn't just apply to middle and high school girls, but to anyone when they are feeling overwhelmed. I hope these tips bring you some peace and calm next time life gets you down. 

1. Perspective -- the phrase "first-world problems" may be trite, but it has become popular for a reason. During times of major stress in my life, I try to step make and put everything in perspective. It's really easy to get caught up in your particular problem and think the world is coming to an end. Am I the only one who can be a tad on the dramatic side? It's so important to remember to keep perspective. Whatever is causing your anxiety, probably isn't that bad even though in the moment it may seem like it. Sometimes our problems just seem straight up silly and almost laughable when we put them in perspective. I tend to get so sucked into my problems that I forget to take a step back and breathe. When I do, I usually remember how blessed I really am and how a lot of these stresses usually come out of things that are actually blessings in my life. My house is messy? That means I have a roof over my head. I'm not happy about my new responsibilities at work? That means I have a job. My baby is teething and keeping me up all night? That means I'm lucky enough to have a healthy child. My husband left his stuff all over the house again? That means I have someone to share my life with...the good, the bad and the annoying. This method might seem a little corny, but I find that gaining perspective during a difficult time really helps our thankful spirit come out instead of focusing on the negativity. Which brings me to my next point...

2. Positive attitude -- Having a positive attitude is so important these days. I mean have you watched the news recently? It is filled with bad things that are meant to bring us down. It's so easy to be negative in our world today, but a negative attitude is detrimental, especially during stressful seasons of life. I am the first to admit that I sometimes struggle with having a positive attitude and seem to focus on what's going wrong so much more quickly than on what's going right. All this does is accentuate the bad and belittle the good. We define the good and bad in our lives. We have more control over the outlook of our day than we give ourselves credit for. There's always good to outweigh the bad, but we have to evoke the right attitude in order to see that. Plus, who wants to be around someone who is negative and always complaining?! I sure don't. A positive attitude goes a long way in uplifting ourselves on a bad day.

3. Praying -- Are you familiar with the phase, "Have you prayed about it as much as you've talked about it?". I can fall into this trap so easily. It's so effortless to tell people all about your problems, but never bring them to God. I have even been guilty of asking people to pray for me about certain stresses in my life without even praying about them myself. There's a therapeutic aspect to venting to a friend, but I think we often forget about how restorative a conversation with God can be. I find that when I complain to a friend, I might come away feeling better for a little while, but those same problems seem to creep back up. When I bring my struggles to God, He gives me a peace beyond understand and a healing in return. He lifts my burdens off my back and carries them on His own, leaving me feeling weightless and free. Praying takes more discipline than just complaining to a friend or even posting about it on Facebook (yep, we've all done it), but it's a much more beneficial step for us in the end.

4. Past answered prayers -- One of the most powerful ways I deal with stress is thinking about what God has done for me in the past. There are times when I think there's no way a situation is going to work out or a solution to a major problem is ever going to come, but then I stop and think, "Has God ever failed me?". Well....no. I think about the fact that a year ago I had a whole other plethora of problems in my life that have since been resolved. I think about all the prayers I've prayed that have been answered and how God has always given me a solution whether that be something tangible or just letting me know that He is the solution. He's never left me hanging, so why am I thinking He will this time? A calm comes over me when I remember the faithfulness of God in my life knowing that God will continue being reliable and consistent for me.

Breastfeeding Essentials

Breastfeeding essentials, sounds like a blast, right? Breastfeeding is something that has been happening since the beginning of time, but in recent years, the topic has become a little more taboo. Breastfeeding isn't always discussed as freely as it should be and a lot of women are very private about the subject. While it's totally fine to be modest when it comes to breastfeeding, I believe it's important for us, as women, to be open and honest with each other when it comes to anything and everything mommy. No, I don't mean women cutting each other down as parents and insisting that their way is the best. I mean that it's important for mothers to humbly share their knowledge and what works for them. That is why I chose to write this particular post. These are the items that have really helped me when it comes to breastfeeding. I have a 2.5 month old son and he has been exclusively breastfed since day one. I was so grateful for the friendly advice I got from other mothers about things that helped them while breastfeeding. I wish there were more articles out there with helpful hints concerning the subject. Breastfeeding is hard and it takes dedication. These products have helped me stick with breastfeeding despite the struggles and challenges I've faced on the way. So here's my two cents:

1. Medela In Style Advanced Pump -- Whether you are planning on returning back to work or you are going to be a stay-at-home mom, I highly recommend getting a breast pump and specifically this one. The Medela In Style Advanced Pump is an awesome breast pump! I got it free through my insurance (retails $200) and it has been so helpful for me as a working mom. I recommend that you ask your health insurance if they cover a breast pump before you go out and purchase one because most companies will cover one for free! This pump is great because it's electric and a double pump meaning the pump does all the work, so I don't have to AND I can pump on both sides at once which cuts my pumping time in half. I use this pump on the days that I work, so that I can pump bottles for my baby. The pump is compact, light, and easy to bring with you wherever you go. It's super easy to use (even though it looks a little intimidating at first) and hassle-free. I also love the Medela brand because you can get everything you need for the pump (bottles, tops, nipples, etc.) at Target instead of having to order online. I think it's awesome to have a pump for when you need to leave your baby with someone or if you want daddy to be able to help out and feed baby as well. As much as I love breastfeeding, sometimes it's nice to be able to have some help and not be the sole food source. I was terrified about going back to work because I thought I would have to give up breastfeeding, but this pump has allowed me to continue on exclusively breastfeeding my son. I am so grateful I didn't have to give up breastfeeding and I owe a lot of that to this pump!

 

2. Nipple shield -- The nipple shield was a lifesaver for me in the first few weeks of breastfeeding! Luckily a friend recommended this to me before Grayson was born, so I had one on hand. I would highly recommend buying one BEFORE your baby arrives if you are planning on breastfeeding because when you want it, you want it immediately (because you are in major pain). I knew breastfeeding wasn't going to be a walk in the park and had heard horror stories from many friends. I am blessed to be able to say that breastfeeding has gone very smoothly for Grayson and I. But no matter how smoothly it goes, those first few weeks are always tough! It takes your body a while to adjust to a tiny human being attached to your nipple for a majority of the time. Your nipples literally have to "toughen up" and that process is very painful. I would say it took me a good three weeks before my body was used to breast feeding and I wasn't in pain every time he latched on. But those first few weeks...ouch! I literally felt nauseous each time he would latch on and would tell my husband how ridiculous it was that it hurt THAT badly. That's where the nipple shield came in. I wouldn't use it all the time, but I would use it when one side was in dire need of a break. The nipple shield helped get me through the painful times when it would have been easy to give up on breastfeeding. I picked mine up at Target for under $10 (worth every penny).

3. Lanolin nipple cream -- This cream was another lifesaver during the first few weeks of breastfeeding. Your nipples crack, bleed, and are super sensitive when they are adjusting to breastfeeding. It's painful! This cream was really helpful in making the adjustment bearable and gave me the relief I needed between feedings. The product is natural and safe for your baby to digest (inevitable if you are feeding every 2 hours). Highly recommend having this on hand BEFORE baby arrives as well. You'll thank me I promise! You can find this cream pretty much anywhere and a little goes a long way, so it lasts a long time.

4. Nursing bras -- If you are planning on breastfeeding for any length of time, you are going to want to invest in a good nursing bra. If you are currently breastfeeding, you know how often you are removing your bra. If you aren't yet, then you are about to learn! For the first month or two, your baby eats almost every two hours. It makes life much easier if you are wearing a bra that you don't have to take off  or mess with each time the baby feeds. Find one that is comfortable and easy to latch off and on. I bought two nursing bras before I had Grayson and I love them both. The first one is a soft and comfy wireless bra that I wear at night or if I'm at home for the day. It's a cotton material and allows you to feed your baby very easily while keeping mom comfortable. The second bra I purchased almost looks like a regular bra with underwire but it has the latches on it that make breastfeeding extremely convenient. I needed a nursing bra with underwire for going out in public, just a personal preference. The awesome thing about this bra is that is looks and acts like a regular bra, but just makes breastfeeding a heck of a lot easier! I bought both my nursing bras at Motherhood Maternity and would recommend that store if you want a quality and comfortable nursing bra. I looked at Target and Wal-Mart for nursing bras and couldn't ever find anything that wasn't extremely uncomfortable to wear. Nursing bras are purely needed for convenience, but I think they are worth the investment. I love being able to wear a regular bra and still easily nurse my baby!

5. Nursing cover -- Before I had Grayson, I didn't know what type of mom I would be when it came to breastfeeding. I didn't think I would be the mom that breastfed in public with no cover at all, but I had no clue how comfortable I would be breastfeeding in public even with a cover. I went to a consignment sale and bought a nice Baby Balboa nursing cover for $5. I bought it just in case I needed it in the future and I am really glad I did! The cover has already come in handy so many times. I soon realized that although I don't love breastfeeding in public, I also hate leaving the group and going to sit in a room by myself for 20 minutes while everyone else is together. It wasn't always convenient to find a private (and clean) place to nurse, so I would pull out my nursing cover. I've used it a few times at restaurants and also in my own home while people are over. It's not too big or bulky and is very easy to throw in your bag on the go. You can also wash it very easily. The nursing cover does just that, it covers all the right places without making you feel like you are wearing a blanket. It even has a little peep hole, so that you can keep an on eye your baby while he/she is covered up and eating. The nursing cover keeps you modest and covered, while allowing you to stay present wherever you are. The cover isn't even noticeable to most people. I've used it before and people won't even realize what I'm doing. I really like it and it allows me to breastfeed on the go!