The First Married Year

I can't believe that my husband and I have almost been married 1 year already! In some respects, it feels like just yesterday and in others, it feels like we've been together forever. I can definitely say that our first year of marriage has been one for the books where we grew in love, knowledge, and wisdom of how to be a good spouse to one another. I do not claim to know as much as someone who has been married for 25+ years, but I can say I have learned quite a few things during our first year together as husband and wife. This is by far not everything, but a few good nuggets of truth and encouragement that can help every engaged or newlywed couple make their marriage a more successful and happy one.

1. Loving your spouse is a daily choice -- if you believe that love is an emotion in your marriage, then there will be times where you don't "feel" loving towards your spouse. You can't base your love for your spouse on how you are feeling that day or how they are acting. On those days where you have to pick up their dirty laundry off the floor and take out the trash because they forgot again, you must choose to love them anyways.

2. Be silly together.

3. Even though you now live together, take the time to go on a date and spend time alone together out of the house.

4. Life can get stressful very quickly -- laugh together, as much and as often as you can.

5. Do little things for each other. Surprise each other.

6. Compliment each other -- your spouse needs that reminder that you still find them attractive.

7. Start traditions together.

8. Celebrate the small accomplishments together.

9. Encourage your spouse daily -- they need your constant support whether they act like it or not.

10. Forgive easily and quickly -- holding on to a grudge towards the person who you will spend the rest of your life with is going to be miserable for everyone.

11. You aren't the perfect spouse so don't expect them to be -- they are learning what marriage is all about right there alongside you.

12. Be selfless -- make their lunch, do something sweet for them, clean up after them, even if they haven't done that for you recently. Do it anyways.

13. Love them unconditionally -- don't let your actions towards your spouse be based on their actions towards you. Show them unconditional love even if they may not "deserve" it that day.

14. Be affectionate towards each other -- don't be afraid of public displays of affection. You are married now and it will probably make your spouse feel special.

15. Words can hurt and can never be taken back. Be careful of what you say to each other. Think about what you say and the impact it will have on your marriage before you say it. You will make your marriage a much happier thing if you just think before you speak.

16. Make your spouse feel special -- in all the busyness of life, it's easy to forget to do this, but it's important.

17. Never walk out during a fight.

18. Make couple friends.

19. Find a mentor that has been successful in their marriage and can offer you wisdom and guidance when you need it -- you will need it.

20. Respect and love your spouse's family -- they are your family now too.

21. Respect the way your spouse deals with stress or conflict -- forcing them handle it your way isn't going to work.

22. Tell your spouse you love them. All the time. More importantly, show your spouse you love them. Actions speak louder than words.