Rowan's Birth Story

It's been a little over 3 years since I wrote my last blog post! The last one I wrote was Camden's birth story in April of 2019. SO much has happened in our lives since then! I don't do a good job of keeping up with my blog like I used to, but one thing that has always been important to me is writing out the birth story of each of my children. I absolutely love looking back and reading over all the details of each of their births. Even if no one ever reads this, I know it will be something I will treasure having over the years!  

All this to say, we have a brand new addition to our family! A new little red-headed baby boy named Rowan Jake Gale...our 4th child and our 3rd baby boy. I would have never expected to have 4 kids and to have 3 boys, but here we are! I'm still adjusting to it all, but I feel so blessed with these 4 little people who call me Mama. And Rowan has 3 older siblings who absolutely adore him! He's the perfect little guy to complete our family...our "resident baby"/"forever baby."

Every birth story is so unique and different, and that holds true for me! Every one of my births has been different than the others, and that continues to be the case for Rowan's. I thought I knew exactly how Rowan's birth would go down, but it was something unexpected in many ways! You could definitely say we went out with a BANG with this last child and the way he came into the world!

A little background: I found out that I was pregnant on October 2, 2021. We were SO excited and also terrified at the thought of having 4 kids! I had a miscarriage in March of 2021, and we had been trying since with no luck. I was really wanting a 4th baby, but I also knew if it didn't happen for us sooner rather than later, we would forever say bye to the baby days and move on with just our 3. When we found out I was pregnant with Rowan, I don't ever think I'd seen Josh's eyes get so wide! Haha.

I had major pregnancy anxiety during my pregnancy with Camden. It was really, really bad, and it affected my entire pregnancy. I was determined to have a "carefree" pregnancy this time, knowing it was my last. Unfortunately, only a week into the pregnancy, while we were out of town in New Orleans on a family trip, I started bleeding heavily. I immediately assumed I was having a miscarriage, and my heart sank. I had to wait until we got back from our trip to go to the doctor to find out exactly what was going on. When I got back from the trip, I was so relieved to find out that I actually didn't miscarry. I had another subchorionic hemorrhage as I did in my pregnancy with Emerson. Thankfully, this one wasn't nearly as big or as bad, but it did come with MONTHS of having brown bleeding, which really messed with my head and instilled a lot of fear in me. I was beyond grateful that Rowan remained safe and healthy throughout my entire pregnancy. Despite the hemorrhage (which thankfully healed by about 8 weeks despite me continuing to bleed for months afterward), Rowan was perfectly fine!

And the rest of my pregnancy after that initial hiccup actually went perfectly smoothly! I even had an ultrasound at 32 weeks to see if the baby had IUGR (intrauterine growth restriction) as I had in my previous 2 pregnancies, and thankfully, I didn't, and all was well! I wouldn't have to be heavily monitored during the end of my pregnancy or induced early because of the baby's (small) size. After the first half of the pregnancy, I was able to enjoy the rest of my pregnancy and was even working out a few days a week at the gym and feeling good! This was the best I had felt almost ever in pregnancy, and it was definitely much better than how I felt in Camden's. We also chose NOT to find out the gender of this last baby, so we would be surprised at the birth...yes, we know we are weirdos, but we love the surprise and not finding out! We didn't find out the gender with any of our boys (ironically), but we did find out the gender with Emerson (ironically, our only girl, which was great because then I got to get all the girly stuff ready ahead of time) because she was my most complicated pregnancy and I had a ton of ultrasounds with her.

All this brought us to the week that Rowan arrived AND also the week that Josh would be out of town in Kentucky for his Doctoral program graduation from Asbury. We had known about this graduation since I found out that I was pregnant, and we KNEW that there was a major chance the birth and the graduation would overlap, but we were praying that wouldn't be the case. And of course, that's EXACTLY what happened!

Josh left for Kentucky on Monday, May 16, and he was supposed to be gone all week. We were supposed to go to Emerson's dance recital on Thursday evening, May 19, and then drive up to KY that evening with Josh's parents. We were going to stay until Saturday afternoon and then head back home as a family. We knew this would all be tentative depending on how I felt, but we were going to try to go for it considering Josh had been working 5 years for this graduation! You might be thinking, "Weren't you only 36 weeks at this point?". That's correct, but my babies had all come early, and the last 2 were born right around 37 weeks, so we knew there was a big chance it would be close to this time period. We joked because Josh's graduation was literally the morning I turned 37 weeks, and that's also RIGHT when Camden and Emerson were born, so how funny/frustrating would it be if that's when this final baby came?!

           Filling out forms in the hospital and getting to check off that Josh has a Doctorate degree!

 

I had my 36 week checkup on that Monday when Josh left for KY, and we found out that I was already 3 cm dilated at that time. I was super nervous finding that out, but I knew that it was pretty "normal" for me based on what my body had done in previous pregnancies. All I had to do was make it less than a week then the baby could come. I could do that, right?! Wrong! Before Monday, I hadn't had any pain/cramping/contractions, so I really wasn't too concerned about being dilated. Well, after that appointment, I started having pain/cramping/contractions throughout the week. On Tuesday evening, it got so bad that Josh started to head home from KY. I genuinely thought I was going to give birth without him that night, but then everything fizzled out. That happened a few times, but it never turned into anything consistent. Thankfully, Josh was able to give his presentation on Wednesday afternoon at Asbury then he surprised me by heading home. I can't describe the amount of relief I felt when I knew he was on his way back to us! This way, no matter what happened, at least we would be together!

                                                               Emerson's Dance Recital

I went to the doctor on Thursday afternoon to get checked (for my peace of mind) before we headed to KY on Thursday evening. Now that Josh was home, he was going to drive up there with me after Emerson's dance recital. I was starting to feel better, and the doctor told me that she was very skeptical I would have a baby over the weekend, so we decided to go for it! We went to Emerson's recital then we were off! I had a ton of anxiety starting the drive, knowing I could have a baby in KY, but I was trying to be positive and realistic, knowing I was only 36 weeks and surely, I could make it just a few more days. We made it to the GA/TN line, and then I suddenly started having those pains again. I was definitely panicking on the inside but trying to remain calm and rational on the outside. The cramping quickly turned into contractions. At this point, we stopped at a gas station to see if things stopped or became more consistent. Unfortunately, I had a few more (light) contractions over the course of about 30 minutes, and we made the decision to drive back home. It was scary because I didn't know if my body was about to go into full-on labor, but it was also heartbreaking to make the decision to drive home and miss Josh's big graduation ceremony. Bittersweet for sure. I had such immense guilt for taking this milestone away from him while also knowing there was absolutely nothing I could do to control when this baby came.

Thankfully we did make it home at about 2am and then tried to get some sleep. I woke up throughout the night with contractions, but nothing consistent. I got the kids ready for school in the morning while having contractions and genuinely thought after they went to school, we would head to the hospital. Thankfully Josh's parents came back to the house with us (they were supposed to make the drive to KY with us), so they took the big kids to school and took care of Camden for the day. Once they all left for the day, the contractions still weren't full force, so we took a nap, and when I woke up, I hadn't had any contractions. I was so frustrated at this point. I figured if I was going to make us miss Josh's graduation, I should at least have a baby to show for it, right?!

                                The first time we went to OB Assessment and got sent home!

We decided to drive to OB Assessment just to see what they said since I was having contractions but just not consistent enough. Unfortunately, that's exactly what they said. They said it was mostly Braxton Hicks contractions at this point, even though I was dilated to 4 cm and was 70% effaced. They said I was close, but I wasn't in active labor yet, and they sent me home. Again, I was beyond frustrated but not surprised since I knew contractions were supposed to be 5 minutes apart before you headed to the hospital. I was shocked in a way because I thought surely, with this being my 4th child, my body would just know what to do and would do it quickly. And truly, that IS what happened, but at the time, I wasn't expecting such a "long" pre-active labor. We watched Josh's graduation online, and that was hard to watch emotionally for me, considering I still hadn't the baby, but I felt pretty miserable. The doctor did recommend walking to try to get the contractions going, so that's what I did!

                                                  Walking the baby out in our neighborhood!

Josh and I ended up walking for 2.5 hours throughout our neighborhood that evening (while Josh's parents took the kids to the pool). Thankfully his parents dealt with the kids all day, so we could just focus on my labor! Such a blessing! We were barely moving at most points of the walk (because the contractions were slowly but surely picking up), but we just kept going because I was determined to get this baby out of me! I didn't enjoy this whole being in labor but not in "enough" labor thing at all! And I didn't want the contractions to fizzle out at this point. I was ready to just get the show on the road! I would stop walking while having a contraction, then we would keep going....or should I say, I would just keep on waddling! We were timing the contractions all day, and soon enough, we stopped walking, and they were about 7-8 minutes apart. We were getting close...finally!!

                         I was in a ton of pain this time (unlike the picture from 10 hours prior), but we made it to the hospital to have the baby!

I put the kids to bed, took a shower, slowly finished packing the very last things in my hospital bag, and could feel the contractions getting closer and closer together and more intense. Finally, it was go time! At 10:30pm, we headed to the hospital because the contractions were 3-5 minutes apart and a lot more intense and painful. While this wasn't fun, I was also relieved that this baby was finally coming after what seemed like forever! When I got to OB Assessment this time, I had to pause for intense contractions while checking in and getting hooked up because I was clearly in the "active" labor stage that I wasn't in just a few hours before when I was here. When they checked me this time, I was 7-8 cm, and it was definitely time to get me to Labor and Delivery! I was SO thankful to get to go into labor by myself and not have any pitocin this time around (I had it with Camden and Grayson) and also to have done most of my laboring at home! While it felt like a pain in the butt at the time, I'm grateful I wasn't stuck in the hospital laboring all day.

                           How I labored until they broke my water...it's the only position that felt good!

I didn't plan on getting an epidural (at least that was my hope) because I had a natural birth with Camden and really wanted to attempt that again. Most people think this is CRAZY, but if the labor is fast enough, I honestly think this is the way to go, at least for me. They asked me if I wanted an epidural when I got to Labor and Delivery, and I said no, and I was hoping I could pull it off again! Thankfully I was already 8 cm, so I was close! They asked me about 400 questions while having to stop every 2-3 minutes for me to have an intense contraction. I didn't want to sit down, so I was pacing around the room and leaning over on the bed every time I had a contraction. Josh would rub my lower back, and it REALLY helped. He's never really been an active part of my labor before. He's always held my hand and been right by my side, but in the past, nothing he ever did really eased the pain. For whatever reason, him rubbing my lower back during contractions was an absolute lifesaver!

                                                              What hospital life is really like!

The nurse started my IV and got me completely checked in. Then the nurse called my doctor and told her to head to the hospital. Once my doctor got there, she asked me if I wanted my water broken. I asked if that would help progress labor, and my doctor said that it should. I told her, "Then let's do it!". My doctor broke my water which was quick and easy. Then she told me that things might start to get REAL now. Not going to lie, I was definitely scared of the pain ahead because I KNEW what it was like, but I was also so ready to meet my baby and end this labor! I went into the phase of labor called "transition" after that, which is when the pain gets REALLY intense, and I tend to feel really nauseous during that time. Thankfully I didn't get sick either time (with Rowan or Camden's labor), but I always feel like I am going to. This is the time when your body goes from 8-10 cm (usually pretty quickly), but it's also one of the hardest parts of labor!

I was only in the phase of "transition" for a very short amount of time, and then it felt like I had to push. I told Josh and my doctor ran in and checked me. I was fully dilated and completely effaced. It was time to meet our baby! I remember looking at Josh and telling him that I was so excited to find out if it was a boy or girl. The doctor told me to start pushing when I felt a contraction, but unfortunately, I wasn't really getting a break in contractions at that point. It was like one continuous contraction which was pretty awful. So I started pushing and kept pushing as often as I could. I had to switch around positions for the most "effective" push because his head wasn't coming down. Once they told me to move my legs to the side (like a butterfly), and that helped a lot. Very strange looking and feeling, but it got the job done. Then my doctor told me to put my chin to my chest and push. I don't know what I did, but suddenly I heard a loud "POP" in my chest and major pain. I screamed, and the whole room looked at me. They said they hadn't heard anything, so I just kept on pushing, but I would soon find out that I actually injured myself in the process of pushing. (I was pushing so hard that I either cracked a rib or pulled a muscle in my chest. I was in MAJOR pain for a few weeks after his birth because of this. My chest killed me. Only I would hurt myself in that way while pushing!) I just kept saying, "I can't do this!" which I also remember saying with Camden. There is NOTHING like pushing out a baby without any pain medication. It is a feeling like NO other, and it hurts so badly. Thankfully, my doctor and Josh were SO encouraging to me and just kept telling me that I could do this! The pain was pretty unbearable, so I just kept pushing in hopes that it would all end soon! Thankfully I didn't tear at all and didn't have to have any stitches, which REALLY helps with your recovery (I only tore and had stitches with Grayson).

                                                                     Meeting Rowan!

I pushed for maybe 10-15 minutes total, and out he came! Before he was even here, they told me that they could see tons of red hair, which was so crazy! They also let me feel him before he was out, which was cool and weird and amazing! As soon as he came out, both Josh and I thought to ourselves, "This looks just like a boy! Or a very ugly baby girl!". Haha! We both just knew it was a boy at first glance! Josh went to check the genitals to be sure, and for a split second, I thought I saw nothing there, and it might have been a girl, but once Josh opened his legs, it was clear as day that it was a BOY! I really thought it was probably a boy throughout my entire pregnancy, but there was a small part of me that thought maybe it was a girl. I couldn't believe it...I had THREE sons, and two of them had RED hair! I never ever would have guessed in my wildest dreams!

Rowan Jake Gale was born at 12:32am, and he was 6 lbs 2 oz and 19.75 inches long! While the entire labor felt like FOREVER since I was having mild contractions off and on for 24 hours, my active labor was SUPER quick, and I only had to be at the hospital less than 2 hours before he arrived. It all went really quickly and smoothly once we got to the hospital, and I couldn't be more thankful! Rowan was born RIGHT at 37 weeks, and he was perfectly healthy in every way! I was 32 minutes into my 37th week when he arrived, and "full term" is exactly 37 weeks. My prayer the entire time was that he would be healthy and make it to full term. It was amazing how all the details came together! From Josh still being able to make his Dissertation presentation in person to making it home for the labor and delivery, to us starting the trek up to KY but turning around because I started having contractions, to allowing our family to be in town to keep the kids when all of our family lives a few hours away from us, to me being able to have another natural birth with zero complications and a perfectly healthy little guy at my hospital in town and NOT in KY! We are SO thankful! Although we had to laugh because Rowan was literally born on the morning of Josh's graduation, just as we had feared/assumed might happen the entire time!

Rowan's middle name is Jake, after my grandpa (Rowan's great-grandpa), Jacob "Jake" Silver. He passed away last year, and he was the last living grandparent on both sides for Josh and I. Grandpa Jake was a beloved great-grandparent to my kids, and he became someone really special to me as I got older and really got to know him more. He was able to meet Josh several times, and he was able to meet all of my kids (except for Rowan), which was something that meant a lot to me! 

We are so happy that Rowan made it here safe and sound! His big sister and brothers have been completely obsessed and smitten with him since we brought him home. Emerson really wanted a sister, but after seeing Rowan, she can't imagine anyone else. She tells me how cute and adorable he is every day and how much she loves him. She's SUCH a big help already, and she's such a little mama to Rowan. Grayson is also very helpful (when he wants to be), and he really loves Rowan, but with more of a mature and reserved love. Camden's love for Rowan is more of a smothering love. He adores his baby brother, but he's still learning the art of being gentle. They all love to hold him and love on him. Welcome to the family, Rowan! You may never know peace and quiet, but you will always know overwhelming love! We are now a family of 6, and I'm so excited to see what the future holds!

Camden's Birth Story

Long time, no blog! It's been almost a year and a half since I published my last blog, but it feels good to be back. A lot has happened since the last time I blogged back in November of 2017. Grayson is now 4 years old, Emerson is 2.5 years old, and we've recently added a new baby, Camden James, to our family! We are now a family of 5 which seems crazy to me. When I first started this blog, I was newly married with no children, so life has definitely changed! I was really good about blogging through my other two pregnancies and also documenting all of the monthly updates. For a few different reasons, I didn't do any pregnancy updates this time around. I really wanted to write Camden's birth story down because I already love going back and reading Grayson and Emerson's birth stories and all the other updates I did for them. It's crazy how quickly you forget all the details unless you write it down. I don't know how often I will update, but I would love to get back into blogging all of Camden's monthly updates. I have no idea who this would interest, but at the very least, I like to write it all down for myself to look back on! All that to say: here is Camden's birth story! (Lots of TMI and birth details in this blog, just a warning!)

Walking into the hospital for my induction -- last pregnancy picture!

My first picture with Camden right after he was born -- feeling all the emotions!
 

From the start, this pregnancy was stressful for me. It was definitely different from my other pregnancies, and it was by far the most challenging for me mentally, physically, and emotionally. There seemed to be small bumps in the road from the beginning including being told this was possibily a chemical pregnancy and that I would likely lose the baby to a very painful cyst on my ovary throughout the entire first trimester to crippling anxiety at the thought of anything happening to the baby to intense and chronic pelvic pain. By the grace of God, I made it through each of these trials and the baby remained healthy and growing! At my 20 week ultrasound back in December, I was told I had placenta previa. The baby looked great, but I would have to come back at 32 weeks to see if my placenta had moved out of the way. If it hadn't, then I would have a c-section at 36 weeks. I spent the next few months on pelvic rest (no lifting my other kids) and worrying that I may have to have an early c-section. At 32 weeks, I went in for my ultrasound and was relieved to find out that my placenta had completely moved out of the way. I was in the clear! Or so I thought. I happened to ask about the baby's size while they were doing the ultrasound. The tech checked the size of the baby's belly just for fun to give me an estimate on how much the baby was weighing. She immediately looked concerned and said the baby's belly was measuring 3 weeks behind, and overall, the baby was measuring 1 week behind. After talking to my doctor, she did a few more tests, and I was diagnosed with IUGR (growth restriction). I had the exact same thing in my pregnancy with Emerson, so while I was nervous, I was also pretty comfortable with the diagnosis. I know this meant more monitoring and possibly an early induction. After talking to my doctor, I found out that I would be induced between 38-39 weeks as long as everything they were monitoring (blood flow through the umbilical cord, baby's movements, etc.) continued to look okay. I was supposed to be induced early with Emerson also, but I went into labor on my own at 37.5 weeks, so it never happened. The next few weeks went by, and everything looked good at my appointments. I assumed they would let me go to 38-39 weeks and that I would probably go into labor on my own before then.

So happy that he is finally here!

He weighed 5 lbs 4.7 oz.

At 35.5 weeks, I went into my appointment and unfortunately, something was off. The blood flow through the umbilical cord was restricted, and while the baby was okay at the moment, they wanted to induce me right at 37 weeks. I was really torn about it. Obviously, I wanted to do what was best for the baby and would never put the baby in danger. But I also really didn't want to be induced. I ended up having Pitocin in my labor with Grayson, and it was really awful compared to my labor with Emerson which I never had to get Pitocin. I knew there was a good chance I would go into labor early based on my past pregnancies, but also knew I probably wouldn't go into labor on my own before 37 weeks. But whether I liked it or not, I was going to get induced  right at 37 weeks and quickly tried to mentally prepare myself. Thankfully, I was already 1-2 cm dilated and 30% effaced at my 35.5 week appointment, so my body was already slowly preparing for labor. I had multiple appointments over the next 1.5 weeks with the same diagnosis (elevated doppler levels in the umbilical cord) that confirmed that this baby needed to come out at 37 weeks. I spent the next week and a half trying to prepare my body for labor. I went on long walks, drank red raspberry leaf tea, and took evening primrose oil. I also did these things in my previous pregnancies once I hit 36 weeks and felt that they couldn't hurt, but would helpfully help progress things along. At my 36.5 week appointment, I was 2 cm dilated and 70% effaced. The doctor was confident that it would be an "easy" induction and that it wouldn't take much Pitocin to get my body going. At the appointment the day before my induction (April 4), I was 3 cm dilated and 80% effaced. She also said the baby's head was very low and ready for labor. My doctor felt like it would be a quick induction and it wouldn't take very long. My body seemed to be very close to going into labor on its own anyways. I had been losing my mucus plug slowly for almost 2 weeks at this point and on the evening before my induction, I had my "bloody show." There was a part of me that felt like my body was racing the induction clock! Ha.

 Meeting their baby brother

Emerson was a little unsure at first. When she was done holding him, she basically threw him off of her and said, "All done!". Camden was unharmed and thankfully we have taught Emerson to tell us she is "all done" before moving him off of her. Ha!

We were told to report to the hospital at 11pm on April 4 to begin the induction. I tried to nap throughout the day, but I was way too anxious. We said goodnight to the kids and headed to the hospital soon after. I had never been officially induced, so it was a weird feeling knowing we were going in to have this baby. In a way, it was nice to have it all scheduled and planned, but it was very different for me. When I got to the hospital, I checked in, got settled, and then they started me on antibiotics around midnight, right as I hit 37 weeks. I tested positive for Step B, so I had to have two rounds of antibiotics before they started me on Pitocin. I tried to sleep on the delivery bed, but it was super uncomfortable. I also started having real contractions right around the time we got to the hospital. When they hooked me up to the monitor, I asked if I was having a contraction (I had so many intense Braxton Hicks throughout my pregnancy that it was hard for me to even tell at this point) and the nurse was like, "Yep, you are!". The contractions continued randomly throughout the early morning hours but never grew consistent enough for them not to do Pitocin. The induction was still on, but this was just another sign that my body was ready to have this baby. I truly believe I would have naturally gone into labor very soon on my own especially since I started having many contractions right before the induction. It made me feel a lot better about being induced, like I wasn't kicking the baby out early, but that he/she was ready. At my appointment, the day before, the blood flow through the umbilical cord was the most restricted it had ever been. This was a huge confirmation for me that induction was the right decision. Not that I actually had a choice in the matter, but it reminded me that this was what was best for the baby. And that my preferences ultimately didn't matter. I just wanted a healthy baby in the end! I was really anxious, excited, and nervous when getting to the hospital and even more so after starting to have contractions. So after they started the antibiotics, sleep was just not happening. At 5am, they started me on Pitocin. Finally! I was so ready to get the show on the road!

I slowly started having more longer and stronger contractions. Every 15 minutes or so, the nurse would come in and bump the Pitocin up. This only happened a few times though before the baby's heart rate started to decel during the contractions. Basically, the baby's heart rate always drops a little during contractions, but if it drops too much and too often, then it can be an issue. This same thing happened in my labor with Emerson, so at first, I wasn't worried, but then it became a constant issue for the next few hours. My nurse would come in and get me to turn into different positions to get the baby to "handle the contractions" a little better. There were times they thought the baby was playing with or messing with the umbilical cord and that's what was causing it. Changing positions seemed to be the only thing that would temporarily help. I absolutely loved the two nurses I had during my labor and delivery. They were wonderful! They were so encouraging and kind. They really took care of me. They were really good about not scaring me and gently letting me know what was going on and asking me to switch positions. My doctor came in at 7:30am and broke my water. She said my membranes were "bulging" and that it would be very easy to do. She was right. It wasn't bad at all! I was having contractions, but nothing super painful at this point. I expected them to get worse once she broke my water, but I also knew this would speed things along. Over the next 1.5 hours, the nurse and my doctor watched me like a hawk. It was the scariest part of my labor. My contractions were picking up and starting to get more painful, but because the baby's heart rate kept dropping, I was very distracted from the contractions. I was watching the monitor like crazy because I could tell if the baby's heart rate was decelling or if the baby was taking the contractions well. As each contraction started, I watched the monitor and prayed the baby's heart rate wouldn't drop too low. My new nurse came on shift at 7am and she was in my room fairly often getting me to change positions to try to help with the heart rate. My doctor stayed in my room for a while after breaking my water watching the monitor. She very gently told me that she didn't want to do a c-section on me especially because I had never had one, but if the baby's heart rate kept doing this, that it might happen. I was panicking inside because I don't think anyone wants an emergency c-section. At 5am when they started the induction, I was still 3 cm dilated. At about 8am, I was dilated to 4cm which was good because my doctor wanted to make sure I was progressing at this point with the baby's heart rate continuously decelling. Also, they didn't increase my Pitocin much after the first few times because of the heart rate. They basically gave me enough Pitocin to jumpstart labor, and my body did the rest. Which was an answer to prayer because that is exactly what I wanted to happen -- limited Pitocin. Anyone who has ever had Pitocin knows how awful it is! The baby's heart rate kept decelling until about 9am. At that point, I called my mom (who was driving down to the hospital from Atlanta) about in tears because I really thought a c-section was going to happen. She was good about reminding me that they would only do a c-section as a last resort and for the baby's health. I was still really scared and hung up with her because, at that point, the contractions were getting more intense. I sent out a text to a few friends and family and asked them to pray for the baby to be able to tolerate labor and at that point basically let go of "control" of the situation...not that I had any anyways! Ha. It seemed like the prayers were heard pretty immediately. My body was doing better with the new position they had me in -- sitting up completely Indian style. I asked if I could get out of bed and walk around the room at this point. I knew if I was going to handle these contractions without an epidural, I needed to walk around.

Camden's first bath

 

I have been like this in all my labors, and I know some people think it is crazy, but you have to do labor; however, you feel is best for you! For me, I like to go as long as I can before I get the epidural. I had an epidural with both Grayson and Emerson, so I am not against them at all. I just like to get to the point of not being able to go any farther on my own before I get one. So while I was in a good bit of pain, I was feeling good enough to keep going at this point. I walked around for a little bit and then Josh asked me if he could go get a cup of coffee really quickly. He hadn't slept much all night either, and I think he knew that it was now or never. Haha. I told him that he could go, but to come back quickly. He was gone from about 9:45-10am. While he was gone, my contractions got to the point where I was really struggling with them. I could barely walk around, and my legs were shaking during the contractions. I buzzed the nurse while he was gone and told her that I think I wanted the epidural. Josh came back, and so did the nurse. She told me that she wanted to check me and then we could talk about the epidural. At the time, I was annoyed! Haha. I just wanted the epidural, but I let her check me and was shocked at what she said. She said that I was 7cm dilated and that the baby's head was right there. She told me that I could get the epidural, but if I wanted a natural labor, that she believed I could do it and that it wouldn't be much longer. I opted to keep laboring on my own and not get the epidural. She said I was entering "transition" and soon it would be time to push. She said I could have an IV drug if I wanted and I told her that's what I wanted. Over the next 15 minutes or so, I completed the transition. It was definitely extremely painful and intense, but thankfully there were breaks in between the contractions. My eyes were closed most of the time, and I was squeezing the hospital bed for dear life. My arms were actually sore the next day because of how tightly I was squeezing the railing of the bed! Ha! I was yelling out some in pain and was definitely the most vocal I have ever been during a labor. The nurse checked me again around 10:30am and told me I was at "completion." I cried out, "What does that mean?!" because I had no clue. She said I was 10 cm dilated and it was time to push! I couldn't believe it! It seemed that once my body really went into labor, things went really quickly. And just like they say, I suddenly had the urge to push. It just happened all on its own. They told me to try not to push, so that the doctor could make it in time to catch the baby. I couldn't really control that part! I kept pushing, and thankfully the doctor showed up in time. For whatever reason, I thought pushing was going to be the easier part, but because of the baby's positioning (which we didn't know at the time), I was wrong. Pushing was the craziest and weirdest and most painful feeling! It definitely burned like I've heard it described before and it was just extremely uncomfortable. Pushing took about 15 minutes although it felt like an eternity. I felt like I was in an alternate universe. It was like some weird out of body experience. It was definitely one of the hardest things I have ever done! Josh later told me that there were many people in the room at the birth including a few students (which they had mentioned to me at the beginning of labor) and I had no idea! I was so focused on pushing the baby out and managing the pain that I really had no idea what was going on around me! At 10:50am, Camden James Gale was born! He weighed 5 lbs. 4 oz. and was 19 inches long. My doctor was shocked because when he came out, he was "sunny side up" or "face presentation" which means that he was facing the wrong way coming out. That explained why pushing was so difficult. They later told me that if he was in the regular birthing position, I would have pushed him out before my doctor arrived. But because he was turned around, it took a little longer and a little extra work on my part. Thankfully, he was perfectly fine though! It all happened so fast thankfully! Later, my nurse told me that even if I had wanted the epidural, I wouldn't have had time for one. And she never got around to giving me the IV drugs either -- again, no time! Definitely a blessing for a natural birth.

Daddy is in love.

Mommy and her 3 babies

Grayson's first time holding Camden

Snuggling my girl

The first thing I saw was Camden's face -- in the moment, I just knew it was a BOY! He looked so much like a HE. They laid him on my chest, and I quickly checked -- yep, it was a boy! I had thought it was a boy my entire pregnancy, so I wasn't completely shocked. It was still really fun to wait to find out though! I can't believe I had TWO sons! My initial reaction was different with Camden that it was with the other two purely because I had just had a natural birth. I think I was in shock for a little while after he was born. It was the craziest experience and I couldn't believe I had done it. So while I was so happy to finally meet him, I was also in a very weird headspace and recovering from the intense pain. Camden cried the most out of all my kids right after he was born, but then quickly calmed down and was so relaxed and happy. The hospital let us have an entire uninterrupted hour of skin to skin time right after he was born which was amazing. No one was in the room, not even the nurses, and it was a really special time. I was still really nervous about his health and was anxious to make sure everything was okay. They weighed him, and he was 5 lbs. 4 oz. and 19 inches long. They did all the tests and checked his lungs, and everything was perfect! I had to have 2 steroid shots the week before he was born to make sure his lungs were developed at birth. They had also warned me about a possible NICU stay just because he was born early, so I was prepared for that. I was so relieved to find out he was perfectly healthy!

Grayson was beyond thrilled that he was going to have a brother! He was giddy with excitement and so interested in him!

Grayson checking out Camden's hair

The closest picture we got to all 5 of us! Ha!

The past 9 months and really, the past year (the months leading up to getting pregnant with Camden) were some of the hardest of my life. I dealt with extreme anxiety and fear and a lot of physical pain and restrictions. It tested me in ways I had never been tested before. I was so nervous and scared about so many things, but God was so faithful! He worked together every detail and got our Camden James here safe and sound. The middle name James was inspired by the Bible verse, "Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like shifting shadows." -- James 1:17. I truly believe Camden is a gift from God. I believe that of all my children, but this baby was truly a gift from the Lord and God showing His goodness to us. Camden is so special to me, and his life is so precious. We are truly blessed beyond measure. We are now adjusting to life as a family of 5. Besides lack of sleep, we are doing really well! Camden is the sweetest baby and the perfect addition to our family. Grayson and Emerson are in love with their new baby brother and that has made the transition a lot easier! If you made it this far, thanks for reading! I'm excited to share Camden's updates as the months go on and to hopefully keep this blog updated!